Tom Coburn: “Have You Kicked An Unemployed Person Today?”

No, this isn’t last month’s news that accidentally slipped into today’s news cycle. The Oligarchs are doing the same thing again today.

Last month Senator Jim Bunning (R—Cocksucker) put a hold on unemployment benefits for millions of American workers. And Senator Tom Coburn (R—Malpractice) thought that was such a neat idea, he’s doing it too.

Because of Tom Coburn’s little tantrum, people who have been out of work for six months will lose their benefits, temporarily if not permanently. And people who have just now been thrown out of work will have an indefinite delay in receiving jobless benefits.

The Senate will try to resolve this issue when they return from Spring Break in two and a half weeks.

Tom Coburn justified his bullying frenzy with:

“Because I can. And anyway, poor people smell like sour milk, huh huh huh huh huh. Hey, did I tell you, my mommy and daddy are cousins. And I’m a doctor. Spread ‘em, huh huh huh huh.”

Senator Dick Durbin summed up the difference between Democrats and Republicans:

“We really believe that the unemployment situation is an emergency economic situation. Republicans do not.”