Please Help Jon Kyl Go Home for Christmas

The War on Christmas is getting more brutal than ever this season. This time it isn’t just pagan cashiers saying “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas.” Those devious liberals are finding more and more subtle, insidious ways to piss on Jesus.

As you’ve probably been reading, Senate Republicans are doing their usual stalling tactics against the New START agreement, the omnibus appropriations bill to keep the government running; you name it. Time is running out. And now Harry Reid — did somebody give him a spine for Christmas? — has announced that the Senate will work through the Holidays, if that’s what it takes to get their work done.

And this threat, this sacrilege — the Persecution of Christians! — is not sitting well with Senator Jon Kyl:

“It is impossible to do all of the things that the majority leader laid out without doing — frankly, without disrespecting the institution and without disrespecting one of the two holiest of holidays for Christians and the families of all of the Senate, not just the senators themselves but all of the staff.”

Of course, if the Senate would just VOTE on these bills — instead of filibustering and delaying and putting holds on everything — they’d probably finish their work in time to go home tomorrow. But try explaining that to a Republican.

Meanwhile, Jon Kyl might not get to go home and open Christmas presents with his family. To borrow a phrase from one of his biggest idols — Jon Kyl would like his life back.