“The Art of War” by Eric Cantor

That quaint old book by Sun Tzu was entertaining, but it’s hopelessly passé nowadays. Fighting? “Know Your Enemy?” Get with it.

Eric Cantor (R—Inbred) knows how to conquer a country: Send some volunteer aid workers over to help the refugees inside an enemy country, allow this enemy country to kill those aid workers (i.e. your own citizens) and — Presto! — you have now destroyed your enemy.

This is how Turkey conquered Israel. As you probably know by now, Israel is toast! They’ve been destroyed by Turkey.

Eric Cantor — and the bone-stupid rednecks that elected him — probably doesn’t know this, but Turkey is a member of NATO. And NATO is kind of like a biker gang — all on one, one on all. If a NATO member is attacked by another country, every other NATO member is obligated to attack that country.

Israel’s murder of those Turkish aid workers (and one American citizen of Turkish descent) probably isn’t an act of war — technically anyway. Just imagine, the United States having to declare war on Israel for attacking another NATO country.

What would we do? Withdraw from NATO, or attack the only country in the world that doesn’t hate us?

Meanwhile, Egypt will be keeping the border open “indefinitely” between Egypt and the Palestinian Territory. That’s good news for the one and a half million Palestinians who’ve been isolated in Gaza for the past three years.

Those swarthy peasants needed to be severely punished, of course. They voted for Hamas. No Democracy For You!