Spelling Out the Obvious

This special issue of “DUUUHHH!!!” has TWO cover stories. First: Traffic is getting worse. Hold the phone! Who knew??? They had to do a study to find this out? Christ, all they had to do was get behind the wheel and try to go somewhere.

And the other earthshaking revelation is: Republicans might be losing support among Hispanic voters. [Gasp!] Say it isn't so! Nobody was more shocked by this possibility than Tom “Kill-All-The-Mud-Races” Tancredo (R-Wingnut).

Yes, illegal immigration is a serious issue with no simple solutions. Bring on the demagogues. The outcry against illegal immigrants is sort of like the fury against school busing in the 1960s and ‘70s (speeding up integration by busing students away from their own neighborhoods and into other school districts). A lot of the resentment was legitimate and not based on racism. But the George Wallaces of the day sure got lots of political mileage out of it. They could whip millions of rednecks into a frenzy just by going on and on about “that #!$#%$#$!! busing.”

Unlike today’s Republicans, George Wallace didn’t act puzzled when Blacks didn’t vote for him.

The most rightwing elements of the Republican Party are trying to get the same political mileage out of illegal immigration. They don’t need to spew out stereotypes and racial slurs. All they have to do is keep hammering away at “them” and “illegals” and “guarding our border,” and millions of voters go into a white-hot fury. Like with school busing, a lot of this fury is legitimate and not based on racism.

But the Republicans are purposely using this issue to fan the flames and court every single-digit-IQ sister-humping mouthbreathing xenophobe in the country. And then they wonder why they're losing Hispanic voters.