The Attack of the Fifty-Foot Elizabeth Warren

Wall Street barons are getting their inbreds all riled up and scared shitless over that Comminist wealth-redistributor who’s running for the U.S. Senate in Massachusetts.  If you think the GOP is the party of job creation — and you keep getting lost in your one-room apartment — then we’ve got a sca-a-a-a-ary movie for you.  Break out the popcorn and Raisinettes, sit back and get ready to start screaming.  Ready?

Elizabeth Warren Throws Rocks!

OOOOOHHHHH!!!!  When Obama’s fascist goons came for the Wall Street CEOs, I said nothing…then when they came for me…

Wall Street is scared to death of Elizabeth Warren.  They’ve instructed their prostitutes in Congress to do whatever it takes to keep her out of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau — never mind that she personally designed that agency for the purpose of preventing another 2008-style Wall Street meltdown.  And Wall Street’s hookers followed their pimps’ orders right down to the letter.

Since Obama was planning to appoint Elizabeth Warren to head the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau during a Senate recess, the Senate responded by not taking any more recesses.  Even during their six-week vacation last summer, technically they weren’t in recess.  But YOU try taking a six-week vacation and then telling your boss, "Huh, no, I wasn't on vacation."

Another Wall Street prostitute, Patrick McHenry (R—Skank), was ordered to get up in Warren’s face during a hearing last May and call her a liar.  Skanky did exactly as he was ordered.

Now that Elizabeth Warren is running for the Senate, Corporate America will spend whatever it takes — and stoop as low as they need to stoop — to make sure she’s defeated next year.  Wall Street’s current prostitute, Scott Brown (R—Bimbo), is following his pimp’s orders just fine, thank you very much.

Hopefully Scott Brown’s infamous “Thank God” comment will be aired endlessly on every Massachusetts TV station between now and November 2012.  In case you don’t know the background:  Elizabeth Warren was recently asked how she supported herself during college.  Referring to Scott Brown — handsome dimwitted Playgirl centerfold-cum-politician — she joked that “at least I kept my clothes on.”  When Scott Brown heard about her comment, he replied “Thank God.”

Asshole.

Anyway, the 2012 Elizabeth Warren-Scott Brown campaign will probably be the mudslingingest most expensive campaign of the year, outside of the White House race.  The GOP’s pitiful “Elizabeth Warren Throws Rocks” ad is just the beginning.

Most Voters Blame Bush for Recession

As dismal as Obama’s poll ratings are, a large majority still blames Dumbya for the shitty economy. Damn, the rightwing echo chamber has shat out billions of dollars worth of propaganda, and this is all they have to show for it?

According to a Quinnipiac poll, 54% of the respondents say Bush is responsible for the “current condition” of the economy. 27% blame Obama. Among independent voters, 49% blame Bush and 24% blame Obama.

And, 67% of the public wants any deal on the debt ceiling to include higher taxes for corporations and wealthy individuals, as well as reduced spending.

Aside from blaming either Bush or Obama, some Republicans have a different theory on who’s to blame. Congressman Spencer Bachus (R—Duuuhhh) says our current recession is the fault of presidents Franklin D. Roosevelt and Lyndon Johnson.

And Rep. Patrick McHenry (R—Wall Street Hooker) says it’s all Elizabeth Warren’s fault. After all, she created that Nazi/Communist Jackbooted Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, whose sole purpose is to bully and terrify banking executives. Those poor Wall Street shrinking violets are scared shitless to lend any money or do ANYTHING because that big mean Elizabeth Warren is glaring at them and threatening to steal their lunch money.

And since banks are afraid to lend money (because of Elizabeth Warren), businesses can’t hire any new employees and the economy will continue on its downward spiral forever.

Damn You Elizabeth Warren!