Who Hijacked Our Country

Sunday, December 19, 2004

John Kerry isn't Dead Enough. Keep Killing Him.

“Get a life.” “Get over yourself.” “Move on!”

Yes, these are all clichés, but sometimes there’s no other possible response to someone who continues to beat a dead horse, and continues and continues…

Swift Boat Veterans for Truth – and now they’ve changed their name to the shorter and more concise Swift Boat Veterans and POWs for Truth – was one of the major Republican hit squads whose purpose was to defeat John Kerry. Well, the job was done. Mission accomplished. Bush won the election, and that was almost seven weeks ago. Yoohoo! Snap out of it!

This group’s name always reminds me of that Saturday Night Live skit “Coffee Talk” with Mike Meyers: “I’m getting verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. I’ll give you a topic. Swift Boat Veterans for Truth contains neither veterans nor truth. Discuss.”

Anyway, Swift Boat Veterans and POWs and Red Blooded Patriotic American He-Men for Truth (I’m guessing that’ll be their next name) will be convening next month. They’ll be celebrating Kerry’s defeat, and also making plans to continue speaking out about Kerry’s Viet Nam service and his anti-war activities after his discharge. What a fascinating topic; nobody’s ever brought this up before. I can’t wait.

The group also plans to make sure Kerry doesn’t run for the White House again in 2008. Hey, we agree on something. (If they were smart they’d want Kerry to run again in 2008.) But the Democratic party and 50 million voters will make it 100% certain that Kerry doesn’t even think about running in 2008.

Swift Boat Veterans and POWs and Red Blooded Patriotic American He-Men for Truth (hereafter referred to as SBVPOWRBPAHEFT) is claiming that “the media” didn’t give them enough attention and didn’t dwell sufficiently on the earthshaking matter of Kerry’s Viet Nam records and his anti-war activities. Well, maybe by the next election Sinclair Broadcasting will own a few hundred more TV stations and we’ll all have 24 hours a day of All Kerry, All The Time. Even if he isn’t running for anything.

Get a life.


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