War in Afghanistan
A friend e-mailed this to me:
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Oakland Raiders. The only thing missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl victory.
Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a window from 80 yards away. Then he threw another grenade from 50 yards down a chimney, and then hit a passing car going 80 miles per hour.
“I've got to get this guy!” the coach said to himself. “He has the perfect arm!” So, he brought the young Afghan to the States, and taught him the great game of football. The next season, the Raiders made it through the playoffs and went on to win the Super Bowl.
The young Afghan was hailed as a hero of football. The Coach asked him what he wanted, and the young guy said that he just wanted to call his mother.
“Mom,” he said into the phone, “I just won the Super Bowl!”
“I don't want to talk to you,” the old Muslim woman says. “You have disappointed us. You are not my son!”
“Mother, I don't think you understand,” pleads the son. “I've just won the greatest sporting event in the world!”
“No! Let me tell you,” his mother retorted. “At this very moment there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get assaulted!”
The old lady paused, then said, “I will never forgive you for making us move to Oakland!”