Supreme Court: It’s Not Just for Bribery Any More
Halliburton is asking for a little help from America’s Bribery Clearinghouse (formerly known as the U.S. Supreme Court). Shouldn’t be a problem.
After all, this is the same “court” that selected a president in 2000. Shortly afterward, one of the court’s “justices” went on a hunting trip with the vice president he had just selected, even though this vice president had a case pending before the court. They insisted there was no conflict of interest here. A bit later, the “court” ruled in favor of its selected vice president; and this ruling had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that the vice president and this court “justice” had just been out in the woods together, hunting and bonding and doing guy stuff.
And just last week the Supreme Court ruled that bribery is a constitutional right. Purchasing a few congressmen, rigging elections — aw come on, it doesn’t get any more American than that.
And now they’ll probably do this little favor for Halliburton. Incidentally, this vice president — who was selected by the Supreme Court in 2000 — was once the CEO of Halliburton. Small world.
Anyway, Halliburton needs a little favor from
Jamie Leigh Jones, a Halliburton employee in Iraq, was gang raped by some of her coworkers. This link goes into more detail.
After she was gang raped, her supervisors locked her in a shipping container for 24 hours. No food, no water and needless to say, no medical help of any kind. Jamie Leigh Jones filed a lawsuit against Halliburton (who wouldn’t?).
And now Halliburton wants the Supreme Court ("We Can Fix Anything!") to take care of this little, uh, problem. Halliburton’s current CEO and Justice Antonin Scalia will probably go on a duck hunting trip soon. And this of course will have no connection with anything when the Supreme Court dismisses that pesky lawsuit against Halliburton.
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Michael Steele, the GOP’s Token Negro, said: “Strengthening our Party for the 2010 elections is going to take a massive grass-roots effort all across America. That is why I have authorized a Census to be conducted of every Congressional District in the country.”