Who Hijacked Our Country

Monday, March 08, 2010

Health Care Reform Could Derail the Stock Market!

Wait! Hold the phone! I’ve suddenly realized what a disaster Obamacare would be for the stock market.

I’ve seen the light!

Jim Cramer spells it out. Stocks are rallying, and right now a huge expansion of government bureaucracy and higher taxes — i.e. socialized medicine — would wreck everything. And he’s right.

We need to look at the larger picture. Enough already with the whining: “I have cancer and my HMO just dropped my coverage, WAAAAAHHH!!!”

These self-centered class warriors need to think more about Wall Street instead of themselves, for a change. Instead of:

“My spouse has just been diagnosed with a terminal illness, and on top of that, I’m afraid we’re gonna lose the house and our life savings!!!”

Look up, take a deep breath, force yourself to smile, and say:

“Hey, have you seen the Dow Jones report today? Fantastic!”

Fortunately, the abortion issue might derail this government takeover of our health care. Come on, Fetus-Head “Bart” Stupak — Wall Street is counting on you!

In other news: Tom DeLay admitted he became America’s most hated reviled shat-on politician because he wanted to.

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Blogger jadedj said...

There is no end to the shit these guys come up with. And DeLay...Jesus don't get me started on that prick. How the deuce did we ever spawn these peckerheads? There's no accounting for greed, arrogance and stupidity.

March 8, 2010 at 3:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Exactly! And now the opposition is quoting from an MSNBC source? How very liberal to quote somebody JonStewart tore a new one back in March 2009


March 8, 2010 at 3:51 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

jadedj: Those Wall Street tycoons (and their sycophants) live in their own cozy isolated little world, where they don't have to give a flying fuck about anybody else.

Anonymous: Thanks for the link. I hadn't seen that Daily Show episode before. Jon Stewart can sure rake 'em over the coals.

March 8, 2010 at 4:24 PM  
Blogger Beekeepers Apprentice said...

When Jim Kramer failed miserably to realize there was a recession coming, and kept telling people to buy buy buy! real estate, he turned around and called himself an "entertainer."

The market derails if Britney Spears gets caught going commando, so I wouldn't worry too much.

March 8, 2010 at 4:40 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Bee: That's exactly why I don't give any credence to these economic forecasters, no matter what they're predicting. They didn't see the 2008 meltdown coming until it was already here, and now we're supposed to trust them and start worrying every time they make a dire prediction.

March 8, 2010 at 4:46 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Hey isn't that the first thing you do when given a bad diagnosis. I know I would reach for the WSJ to make sure stocks are doing ok. Tom DeLay, isn't he in jail yet? I'm guessing no because he has money and can get the best in advice to keep his narrow ass out of the pokey. Between him and Bunning I don't know which one is the bigger asshole. I have to say DeLay right now, because I think old Jim might have taken a hit to the head with a baseball in his earlier career.

March 8, 2010 at 5:07 PM  
Blogger BadTux said...

Hold it, I keep being told that the magic Free Market Fairy (who looks suspiciously like Milton Friedman in drag, but that's another subject) will just whip his magic wand around, sparkle everything with Free Market Sparkle Dust, and the Magic of the Market will make everything all right! And now Kramer and his set of tools is saying that the Free Market Fairy can't even deal with Americans getting the same right to health care that every other citizen of every other major industrialized country has? Wow. That's some weak-ass Free Market Fairy!

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

March 8, 2010 at 6:01 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: Yes, that's exactly what we're supposed to do. If you get bad news from your doctor, or any bad news at all -- just open your newspaper to the financial section and shout "Yes!! Boy Howdy, just look at that Dow Jones!"

For that matter, I guess we could all become part of the problem by buying stock in WellPoint, Aetna, Blue Cross...

BadTux: I'm afraid that Magic Free Market Fairy has her work cut out for her. If Obama takes over the country with socialized medicine, there won't be enough fairy dust for the Free Market Fairy to work her magic.

March 8, 2010 at 7:43 PM  
Blogger Lew Scannon said...

You know, for the last twenty or so years brainwashed capitalists have demanded that we sacrifice everything for the market. We've sent our jobs over seas, gave up benefits, allowed corporate takeovers, bailed their asses out when they spent too much and cut their taxes, and now the time has come to ask, what is the market going to do for me?

March 8, 2010 at 7:49 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Lew: Excellent question. It's time for a lot more people to start asking it.

March 8, 2010 at 7:51 PM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

This, from the guy who balleyhoo'd the market's bright prospects and lit up the screen with "buy, buy, buy!!!" right before the bubble burst and the market imploded.

Cramer is a creature of Wall Street, another moneyman. What you see is what you can expect. I don't think it's political, as in being an ideological conservative or hard-core Republican. It's about money and the people he deals with who wield lots of it.

Consider the source, then let it out the other ear.

March 8, 2010 at 10:31 PM  
Blogger BadTux said...

The Free Market Fairy is unhappy, but I think it's more about Jim "effin' Moron" Cramer saying that she (he?) is so weak, than anything to do with healthcare... see my blog, I dug up a photo of the Free Market Fairy's reaction to Jimbo :-).

- Badtux the Snarky Penguin

March 8, 2010 at 11:55 PM  
Blogger Holte Ender said...

The beleaguered Greek Prime Minister is in Washington, not to beg for money, but to beg for regulation of the financial institutions so that what has brought his country to their knees won't happen again. However fantastic the stocks are looking regulation needs to be forced on them, we've taken enough crap from them and people like Jim Cramer.

March 9, 2010 at 6:12 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Bad Tux, that is not his magic wand and it's not fairy dust he's sprinkling either. Think of the phrase, don't piss on me and tell me it's raining, that should tell you about the fairy dust and magic wand being used by these people. Just saying is all.

March 9, 2010 at 6:46 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Tom, damn. I did the total opposite. I found out I was holding Wellpoint/Anthem stock and sold it, as soon as I found out. I probably should have kept it now, I see this was wrong and I'll repent or some such.

March 9, 2010 at 6:49 AM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...


- Jim Cramer

March 9, 2010 at 8:09 AM  
Blogger jadedj said...

I second that Holte!

March 9, 2010 at 10:17 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

SW: I hadn't heard of Jim Cramer before yesterday. I usually don't bother reading those doom and gloom articles at MSN Money, but when I saw that headline I just had to click on it and see what the F#$! he was talking about.

BadTux: I'll be over to check out your post.

Holte: Three cheers for the Greek prime minister. It's fitting that in the birthplace of democracy, their leaders can grasp the fact that regulating banks doesn't equal "tyranny" or "communism."

Jess: I don't think I've ever owned any stock from any HMOs. But it wouldn't be a bad idea, since (theoretically anyway) shareholders have a tiny voice in how a company does business.

Randal: You go Jim.

March 9, 2010 at 10:32 AM  
Blogger Demeur said...

Are you talking about Jim pump and dump Cramer?

March 9, 2010 at 10:53 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Mine is taken care of by the trustees, according to the 'rental units wishes till I am 35. Shh, I'm one of those trust fund babies you hear about, so don't tell anyone or they might not treat me the same way again ok? I can give them input and they think about it and usually go against me unless my uncle or hubby take care of it for me. Another time the big man has to do things for the little mindless woman who is an idiot I suppose. Trust me, I was fighting the nutters trying to get rid of these particular stocks when I found out about it. Oh no, Jess you should keep them because of ....... Ooh look, Randal can speak fluent crazy man. Bad Tux, that picture made me spit tea on my screen, I'll send you a bill later for replacement :)

March 9, 2010 at 10:53 AM  

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