Who Hijacked Our Country

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

For Only $15 — YOU can Talk to a Real Live Congressman!!!

Rep. Paul Ryan (R—Peewee Herman) can’t take it any more. Rowdy constituents coming into his town hall meetings and asking embarrassing questions — he’s had it! So what if their taxes are paying his salary (and health insurance, pension, travel expenses)?

In a desperate attempt to squelch the symptoms — without dealing with the underlying cause — Paul Ryan will be charging $15 for the privilege of attending any of his future “public” events.

Going him one better, Rep. Ben Quayle (R—Potatoehead Jr.) will be charging $35 for the chance to see and hear him at a catered luncheon on August 23rd. Can’t wait.

This is one way to keep the riffraff out, while still allowing reporters in; so you’ll still get news coverage without having to answer any uncomfortable questions.

And Rep. Doug Lamborn (R—Ku Klux Klan) doesn’t even want your filthy money. He has forbidden any and all “protests” in or near his office in Colorado Springs. This is the same inbred redneck who referred to Obama as “tar baby” last month.

But hey, the news isn’t all bad. PSSSSST — Wanna see a lewd picture of Michele Bachmann?

AND — equal time and all that — a lewd picture of Marcus Bachmann.

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Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

The problem should be self-limiting.
If these idiots have Democratic opponents who are worth their weight in used Kleenex, they'll get nailed to the wall with attack ads for charging citizens to be able to see and speak to their elected official.

I can hope, anyway.

August 16, 2011 at 12:11 PM  
Blogger Jerry Critter said...

I'd say she has done that before.

August 16, 2011 at 12:31 PM  
Blogger jadedj said...

What's the problem...it's just Michelle having a good ol Amurican porn dog.

August 16, 2011 at 2:09 PM  
Blogger jadedj said...

Btw Tom, history repeats itself:


August 16, 2011 at 2:13 PM  
Blogger Jerry Critter said...

Hmmmm! Brings new meaning to a Perry/Bachmann ticket.

August 16, 2011 at 2:29 PM  
Blogger J. Marquis said...

I agree with SW. If I was running against one of these idiots I would definitely do an ad talking about the pay per question deal.

August 16, 2011 at 8:39 PM  
Blogger Demeur said...

I guess they got this idea from lobbyists. And it looks like the price is going up. And they say the Sopranos were evil.

August 17, 2011 at 6:16 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

SW: I hope you're right. Unfortunately, when you pit used Kleenex against the Democrats' willingness to bring a gun to a gunfight, the used Kleenex wins every time.

Jerry: She sure looks like she knows what she's doing.

jadedj: LOL. Thanks for the link. Rick Perry is the champ; it's not even a contest. Perry must have been thinking about his wealthiest corporate donors while he was going down on that corndog.

Jerry: Between the two of them, they go down on a lot of campaign donors, er, I mean corndogs.

J: Those would make excellent TV commercials. I hope the Dems will do it.

Demeur: I think these corrupt political whores are worse than the Mafia.

August 17, 2011 at 11:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well 15 - even 35 bucks is a bargain for a whore, even though they are a lot less gratification.


August 17, 2011 at 12:31 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Erik: True, that's a good bargain for a cheap whore. But the price will probably go up and up and up.

August 17, 2011 at 1:16 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

you could always get a free Weener Tweeter

August 18, 2011 at 1:17 PM  

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