Who Hijacked Our Country

Sunday, January 08, 2012

The New Redneck Math

The school district of Gwinnett County, Georgia, has found a way to make arithmetic a lot more interesting.  There’s no sense boring your students shitless with a bunch of dry, sterile numbers when you can inject some life into those tired old math problems.

For example:

You have a barroom full of inbred rednecks.  The combined IQ of all of those rednecks is 100, and their average IQ is ten.  Ready?  How many rednecks are in the room?

Now isn’t this a lot more fun than “one hundred divided by ten is…[yawn]…”

Here’s another example:

There’s a bunch of teabaggers holding a spontaneous demonstration on behalf of Koch Industries.  One third of the teabaggers are holding up misspelled signs.  Sixty teabaggers have managed to spell everything right.  How many misspelled signs are there?

Now THIS is the way to make that mundane old arithmetic more enjoyable; something for the kids to look forward to.  And here’s a bonus question:

If Mitch McConnell has 57 chins, how many ounces of vodka can John Boehner glug down while he’s spreadeagled underneath a Wall Street lobbyist?



Blogger Jerry Critter said...

Hey! It's Georgia. They are still living in the nineteenth century. It is amazing that there are still teachers who think these type of questions aare OK.

January 8, 2012 at 6:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think this is an outgrowth of Southern Revisionist History, taught by (among others) a former history professor named Newt Gingrich.

They call the Civil War "The War between the states or the "War for Southern Independence", in spite of what their articles of secession say, they still insist it was over states right. Slavery was an unfortunate, but noble era that was nobody's business but theirs that they would have ended ...eventually

Reconstruction was Federal Terrorism and allowed the Blacks to own whites, until the Klan rose up and turned that around.

Then came Segregation, Share Cropping, Jim Crow, Poll Taxes and Intelligence test. It was their "States Rights" to Ignore the Constitutional right of "Due Process" and Lynch any black they want without trial.

Federal Intervention caused them to form their own party (Dixiecrats) and Civil Rights caused them to become Republicans. They now compare Civil Rights with a Federal Invasion of their homeland.

This is minor surprise


January 8, 2012 at 7:48 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I guess not every one is as intellectual as Obama voters like her or these people or this intellect

January 8, 2012 at 7:51 PM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

LOL, that bonus question is the best laugh of the day.

Erik, many southerners call the Civil War the War of Northern Aggression — ironic, since the war began with a Confederate attack on Fort Sumter, S.C.

January 9, 2012 at 12:16 AM  
Anonymous Carlos said...

LOL @ your commentary! Thanks for the morning laugh.

WTF @ the article. Holy shit that's amazing!

Like they say - you just can't make this shit up!

January 9, 2012 at 3:02 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

I'm thinking this was a history lesson that went totally wrong, given it was math the idiot was teaching, but what do I know.
*sigh* then we have Lisa, still doing the whole... I'm not going to follow along with what we are all talking about, instead I will emulate Bible Spice with word salad. Lise, it's a new year, try something new will ya?

January 9, 2012 at 7:06 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

try something new Jess? Like talking about Rednecks? At least they go to school.

"how many ounces of vodka can John Boehner glug down while he’s spreadeagled underneath a Wall Street lobbyist?"

At least Boehner does it while numb. Obama does it while straight...

How many Obama voters live in a fantasy utopia?
Ans-all of them

How many Obama voters does it take to equal an IQ of 100?

How many Obama voters think that because Healthcare is free it's ok that they aren't working or can't afford housing,heating,electric and food.
Ans-Too many to count

January 9, 2012 at 7:24 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

@Lisa, seems to me you haven't met all of PO's voters. I'll wait while you look up Atherton CA in Wiki, you see that is where I live and I can assure you, it's nowhere near fantasy utopia. So you have proof PO has been spreadeagled with lobbyists then have you? Let's see evidence of that or kindly take to shutting yer pie hole. Again, healthcare is STILL not free in this country since you have to BUY health insurance to be covered. Go look it up and the difference between health care and health insurance may come to you. Even people that are on Medicare have to put a little in the pot for coverage. You really are a piece of work aren't you? No need to answer, it's rhetorical.

January 9, 2012 at 8:49 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jerry: The south will probably keep fighting the Civil War into the next millennium.

Erik: Those poor southerners, still fighting off Northern Aggression and them federal terrorists. The south was playing this card in the 1950s and '60s and they'll probably keep playing it for generations.

SW: The "War of Northern Aggression" -- yup, those poor southerns will always portray themselves as victims.

Carlos: True, sometimes the reality is a lot wackier than anything you could make up.

Jess: No, Lisa is right. Everyone who voted for Obama is a parasite who just wants to lie around smoking pot all day and get free health care and other handouts.

January 9, 2012 at 1:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Um, that ain't exactly vodka that Boner is so greedly guzzling.

January 9, 2012 at 1:53 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Lisa is right. Everyone who voted for Obama is a parasite who just wants to lie around smoking pot all day and get free health care and other handouts.

Not everyone Tom. But alot of them.

But those tea baggers are the ones who can't spell right?

January 9, 2012 at 1:58 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Anonymous: LOL.

January 9, 2012 at 4:07 PM  

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