Who Hijacked Our Country

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Heartland Institute: “Can You Spare Any Change? Every Little Bit Helps.”

How the mighty have fallen.  The Heartland Institute was one of the country’s leading propaganda mills.  They were probably THE top mouthpiece for the science-denying “global warming is a myth” crowd, with huge corporate donations pouring in from the usual suspects.

No more.  The Heartland Institute was last seen slumped over at the corner of Sixteenth and South Main Boulevard, holding up a “Will Work For Food” sign.

The Heartland Institute’s downward spiral is mostly the result of their infamous billboard (pictured at the linked article).  It shows a picture of the Unabomber — Ted Kaczynski — with the caption “I still believe in global warming.  Do you?”

Even their corporate allies thought the billboard was tasteless and not an effective way to influence public opinion.  What were they thinking anyway?  A billboard???  It’s much more effective to sabotage high school science textbooks with “scientific” articles “proving” that global warming doesn’t exist.  Or they could have orchestrated a bunch of “demonstrations” where Real Americans could express their fear and outrage against Big Brother Obama and his Fascist Clean Energy goons.  (See Koch Brothers, Americans For Prosperity.)

Anyway, the Heartland Institute’s donations have taken a nosedive, and their president, Joseph Bast, is pleading for help:

“If you can afford to make a contribution please do. If you know someone, if you’ve got a rich uncle or somebody in the family or somebody that you work with, please give them a call and ask them if they would consider making a tax-deductible contribution to the Heartland Institute.”

Doesn’t that just tug at the ol’ heartstrings?  Please give generously.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...


Maybe they can get Ted Nugent, Hank Williams Jr., Tom Selleck, Bo Derek and Have Glenn Beck host an Old Fashioned Telethon to raise money. Memorial Day is coming up and I'm sure Jerry's Kids will understand.


May 24, 2012 at 2:29 PM  
Blogger jadedj said...

I plan to contribute exactly the same amount that I am contributing to the Wall Street teat-sucking Romulus campaign.

May 24, 2012 at 4:07 PM  
Blogger Mr. Charleston said...

Maybe people are finally over the teabag fad. After all, the final night of American Idol was on and there are other important things that demand our attention, like arena football and the resurgence of roller derby.

May 24, 2012 at 7:22 PM  
Anonymous Jolly Roger said...

I am so sad to hear of the plight of the Klanservative Klanbagging Kochsuckers. These good people should all go to Arizona, and secede. Then Arizona, and the rest of us, would finally get what we all deserve.

May 24, 2012 at 11:40 PM  
Blogger Dave Dubya said...

Poor Heartland Institute. Now, like climate change, people are pretending they don't exist.

May 25, 2012 at 10:21 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

"After all, the final night of American Idol was on "

so you are racists against blacksand
latinas pursuing their dreams?

May 25, 2012 at 12:57 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Erik: LOL. I didn't know Bo Derek was in that category. Ted Nugent and Hank Jr. could hold a Redneck Lollapalooza to help the poor Heartland Institute.

jadedj: What a coincidence! That's the same amount I just contributed.

Mr. C: I'd love to see the teabag fad get relegated to a footnote.

JR: Yes, it really is sad, isn't it.

Dave: LOL, and that's a mighty poetic fate for them.

May 25, 2012 at 2:04 PM  

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