Who Hijacked Our Country

Friday, March 28, 2008

Those Damn Stupid Iraqis!

Condoleezza Rice hit the nail on the head yesterday. It may not be “nice” or politically correct, but she said what needed to be said.

Why does Iraqmire keep getting worse and worse? It’s THEIR fault Goddammit! We did everything right. We brought freedom to those poor oppressed wretches, and how do they repay us? By sitting there festering in their own poverty and pestilence. Ever hear of bootstraps, you lazy bunch of primitive Ay-rabs?? And those hotheaded natives are still running around killing each other, even though we keep telling them to knock it off.

As we've all learned, everything bad that’s happened in America in the past seven years is Bill Clinton’s fault. And by the same token, our 5-year quagmire in Iraq is all Saddam Hussein’s fault. Condi Rice has revealed a shocking insight into the seamy depths of human nature. She said: “Authoritarian regimes are not going to create the condition for the emergence of moderate parties.”

GASP! And here we were all thinking that a dictator “worse than Adolph Hitler” was quietly laying the groundwork for an easy transition to democracy after his overthrow.

Damn You Saddam Hussein!

Another lame-ass excuse reason for our 5-year nightmare is those damn UN sanctions against Iraq. Whose wacky idea was that anyway?

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Blogger Randal Graves said...

Anytime one of these bastards utters something that inane, I can't help but think of this exchange from The Simpsons:

Jay Sherman: How do you sleep at night?

Rainier Wolfcastle: On top of a pile of money with many beautiful ladies.

It's amazing the latitude that cognitive dissonance or inherent psychopathic tendencies offers.

March 29, 2008 at 8:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Instead of imposing sanctions on Iraq, we should have trained them all to be florists, so that when we invaded, they'd be ready to throw flowers at our soldier's feet.

March 29, 2008 at 10:35 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Randal: The most infuriating thing about this is, the excuses the neocons keep coming up with are the exact reasons that all those "moonbats" didn't want to invade Iraq in the first place. 4,000 dead soldiers later, they're telling us "oh, it didn't work because ______________"

March 29, 2008 at 10:41 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Ron: Hey, that's a thought. Anything would've worked better than the way we did it.

March 29, 2008 at 10:46 AM  
Anonymous pXr said...


March 29, 2008 at 11:41 AM  
Anonymous JollyRoger said...

Lecondel Rice is an idiot. I know not how she got her degrees, and I know not why a respected academic institution would have considered her custodian material, let alone faculty. Of all the morons surrounding the moronic monkey, she seems to be the most stupid one of all.

That puts her at the top of the list for the Gopper veep nomination, since the Goppers only promote the incompetent to positions of high authority. The Klanservatives will probably be the only thing that keeps McCavein from nominating her; his buddies Hagee and Parsley probably wouldn't care much for a darkie woman getting too uppity.

March 29, 2008 at 11:45 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

JR: Actually, that might be a shrewd move for McCain to choose Rice for VP. He might capture some conservative black voters who were planning to vote for Obama. And the Klanservatives might not vote for McCain, but they certainly aren't gonna vote Democratic either.

I hope McCain doesn't do this. I'd like to think the voters are smart enough not to vote for him no matter what, but then, look at what we've got in the White House now.

March 29, 2008 at 11:52 AM  
Anonymous JollyRoger said...

I believe that if McCavein doesn't get the Klanservatives to turn out for him the same way they turned out for Chimpy in 2004, he loses. Lecondel would probably be too much for them to stomach. If they sit on their hands, we have President Obama.

Unless, of course, Obama's long association with Chicago political and business figures begins to catch up with him. But even if it does, McCavein is a good deal less than pristine on that front too (although the MSM seems to know nothing of McCavein's corruption.)

March 29, 2008 at 12:13 PM  
Blogger Mauigirl said...

Great post, thanks for pointing out this ridiculous attitude.

March 29, 2008 at 12:23 PM  
Blogger LET'S TALK said...

If the Conservatives would take a good look at our wounded. The men who have lost legs and arms to fill the pocket of the rich who have been given billion dollar contracts in this war.

I think they would have second thoughts about Bush, McCain and the Republican party.

March 29, 2008 at 1:27 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

JR: It's hard to tell. Supposedly a lot of the rightwing blatherers (Coulter, Limbaugh) hate McCain because he isn't conservative enough. I don't know if they mean it or if that's just a gimmick to sabotage the Democratic primary and/or to drive McCain further to the right.

Mauigirl: Thanks. Yup, those neocon rationalizations get more ridiculous every day.

Let's Talk: Unfortunately that's a big "if." Conservatives, just by their nature, are more interested in who gets rich from Iraqmire. They don't give a F#$% about some poor working stiff who got killed or crippled in the war.

March 29, 2008 at 2:13 PM  
Blogger Lew Scannon said...

Those ingrates in Iraq! We give them DU, part-time electricity, unsanitary water, family deaths. the least they could do is bend to our will and practice a form of government almost foreign to them.

March 29, 2008 at 6:48 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Lew: Damn right. Those ungrateful savages have no appreciation for all the great things we've done for them.

March 29, 2008 at 7:38 PM  
Blogger Mile High Pixie said...

Dang! Lew took the words out of my mouth, or rather beat me to them. Gee, I can't imagine why they wouldn't be thankful for how we've turned their daily lives upside down and made a lot of things worse, including encourage Al-Qaida to come a-knocking. But Ron Nasty also brings up a good idea that I'd like to take further--we need to train some of the Iraqis to be confectioners so they could have handed out chocolates to go with the flowers.

Or maybe the Iraqis are pissed because they're gun shy? After all, I seem to recall us leaving them high and dry after 1991 when some of them were mobilized to get rid of Saddam then? Once again, we're not even helping in a very useful way. Instead of doing it from the inside, we're imposing it from the outside. Did any of the neocons think about this and put themselves in someone else's shoes? Did they think how others might not be interested in having *any form of government* forced on them?

Oh, thinking, that's for sissies. Never mind.

March 30, 2008 at 10:50 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Mile High Pixie: Yeah, I can't believe how we abandoned them in 1991 after the first invasion. I was glad we didn't stay and "finish the job" since that would have led to the quagmire that we're in now. But Bush 41 had no business encouraging thousands of Iraqis to mobilize against Hussein, and then abandoning them to be rounded up and slaughtered. What a combination of callousness and stupidity.

March 30, 2008 at 3:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The key word is responsibility, something people in this administration and in public office fail to accept (except Spitzer). So now we're blaming the Iraqis for the mess that we created? I pity Conde because it is beyond me how someone so bright and who taught at one of America's most prestigious academic institutions could be so...so..stupid. But then again look at the people she is surrounded by, maybe stupidity is contagious.


March 31, 2008 at 12:10 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jo: Responsibility, there's a quaint concept. Nowadays that's only for individuals. If a high-ranking government official invades a sovereign nation and wrecks millions of lives, he/she isn't responsible. But those people whose lives were devastated -- it's their own fault. Talk about blaming the victim.

Same with our domestic economy. Greedy inept CEOs who could fuck up a wet dream are coddled and bailed out. Their thousands of laid off employees -- hey, bootstraps, you lazy deadbeat.

Go figure.

March 31, 2008 at 12:19 AM  

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