Who Hijacked Our Country

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Conservatives Are Happier Than Liberals

Of course they are. Ignorance is bliss.

Seriously though, this article only deals with one aspect of the liberal/conservative divide: whether or not government should be involved in the economy.

This used to be one of the main differences between the two parties. Republicans believe in individual freedom and responsibility, with a limited role for government. Democrats believe in a larger government that helps the needy and protects people against unscrupulous business practices.

As far as this issue is concerned, it makes sense that economic conservatives would be happier than liberals. The article says conservatives are better at rationalizing economic inequalities. The people who scored highest on the happiness scale were the ones who agreed with these statements:

“It is not really that big a problem if some people have more of a chance in life than others;” and

“This country would be better off if we worried less about how equal people are.”

But “free enterprise” vs. “too much government meddling” is no longer the main issue. The Conservative “Limited Government” umbrella now includes a shitload of rightwing knuckledragging wackjobs, and their ideal government is about as “limited” as the supply of salt in the Pacific Ocean.

Warmongers, xenophobes, racists: guess which party these losers are aligned with. Are they happy? And who’s gonna build that multi-billion dollar high tech fence around our entire border so we can keep them icky furriners out — a “limited” government?

As we speak, our small “hands-off” government is pouring hundreds of billions of tax dollars into an endless war; and similar wars are being planned. And since 9/11 our “limited” government has unleashed the Patriot Act and other Big Brother atrocities that should infuriate the traditional Conservative.

We’re all familiar with those ubiquitous rightwing talking heads, columnists and bloggers whose sole reason for existence is: Fear! Paranoia! They’re coming to get us! If we pull out of Iraq there’ll be a bloodbath! Those Islamofascists are gonna come over here and kill us as soon as we turn our backs! You don’t support our troops! You hate America!

Do these people sound happy to you?

And take these hate-spewing gaybashing Biblehumpers (please!). Guess which party panders to them. Are they happy? And who would enforce all of the anti-gay, anti-abortion, anti-birth control, anti-everything laws that these assholes are clamoring for? A “limited” government? A private company?

cross-posted at Bring It On!



Blogger Miss Kitty said...

Tom, this is why I [heart] you. Too bad that just about all of the wingnuts wouldn't get the sharply-pointed commentary here. And BTW, where are the *real* conservatives these days, and why the fuck don't they come out of the woodwork and give their party the enema it so badly needs?

GOP: God's Own Party. Greedy Old Pigs. [sigh]

May 8, 2008 at 6:23 PM  
Blogger Snave said...

I look at some of the comments from right-wingers on lefty blogs and I don't see how they could possibly be happy. It seems they are afraid of too many things to truly be happy. Of course those of us on the left are fairly afraid of what would happen under a right-wing-controlled government, and with good reason, as we have seen it during the first half of the Bush presidency. Then again, some could argue that with our spineless Congress, we are still in a right-wing controlled state of affairs.

Which party should be more afraid of its own radical elements? I think if the radical elements from either side were in complete control, it would be kind of Orwellian. I also think we are more likely to end up going that way with the right wingers than we are with the left, because I do think the right is more afraid of more things.

May 8, 2008 at 6:33 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Miss Kitty: Thanks. Yes, I also wonder how those "limited government" conservatives can have anything to do with that gang of neocon thugs that their party has degenerated into.

Snave: True, these rightwing bloggers seem like the least happy people of all. They're too paranoid, too afraid of ten thousand things that might possibly happen.

They're also too anal to be happy: "Spy on everybody. Report all suspicious activity." "I don't want one dollar of my tax money going to help some idiot who can't make it on his own."

May 8, 2008 at 11:47 PM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

Of course they're not happy when lefty kooks like you are opening the gates to the homersexuals, mexcans and Muslims like Barack Hussein Osama while taking prayer out of our schools!

Dammit, there was a great Zappa quote along these lines and I can't remember it. Guess I'll do what I always do, mope.

May 9, 2008 at 8:36 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Randal: Damn right, it's time to bring those conservatives down off their happy pedestal. When Barack Hussein Osama takes over, it's gonna be a workers' paradise. All industries will be nationalized, abortion-on-demand will be available to everybody 24/7 and there'll be a nationwide affirmative action program for gay teachers. And Jesus will be banned! MWAAAHAAHAAHAAHAA!

May 9, 2008 at 8:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I signed off on my blog yesterday with, "Democrats promote the common good. Republicans promote corporate greed."

I do not like these polls because people just tell pollsters exactly what they want to hear. I have some conservative friends who are ridiculously rich and they certainly do not seem happy to me at all. They are always bitching about how we need to stop Iran, kick immigrants out of this country, and make drugs illegal (while we're sharing a blunt) and such.

Of course not all conservatives have those beliefs but there are very few of them left. Overall, I think people who help others feel better about themselves and in turn end up being happy.So if conservatives claim to be happier than liberals, then it must be the meds talking.


May 9, 2008 at 9:22 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jo: That's my biggest grudge against conservatives -- they want a rigid set of laws and rules for everybody else but they themselves are exempt. That's why they're able to sit there stoned and talk about cracking down on drugs; and why they can talk about "stopping Iran" without any plans for enlisting or contributing to the war in any way.

As far as who's happier, who knows? That article wasn't very informative since it didn't go into any detail about the differences between conservatives and liberals. But you get back what you give; what goes around comes around -- whatever phrase you want to use. I can't help thinking that greedy anal retentitve types are either unhappy, or they're constantly "unlucky" because of all the bad karma that keeps coming back to them.

May 9, 2008 at 10:11 AM  
Blogger Toni said...

Can we be clear on one thing? There is a big difference between an immigrant and someone who sneaks over in the middle of the night. There are people jumping through hoops to get into this country legally and we're just gonna hand it over to criminals. If you break our laws you are a criminal. There were people bringing suitcase bombs into the country via the Mexican border. It is a national security issue and that is one thing conservatives do want the government to get involved in. And being against people sneaking into our country does not make someone a racist. Conservatives would be against it if they were British too. The way liberals throw that word racist around is ridiculous. I thought you were supposed to be the people that care so much yet you are quick to label people with something like that.

May 9, 2008 at 11:53 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Toni: It's true that racism and illegal immigration are two different issues but they do overlap. I don't really have an opinion on the illegal immigration issue. I know it's a big problem but I don't know the answer.

But a lot of racists and xenophobes have latched onto the illegal immigration issue so they can rant about "them" without having to be blatantly racist. And contrary to what you said, there are lots of illegal immigrants here from England, Ireland, Canada and other "white" countries. They don't get hassled since they look just like "us."

May 10, 2008 at 1:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I am really thinking of converting to conservatism:

- They don't worry about the high price of gas, deficients, nor a bad economy - they have every faith in the power of the strong unregulated American corporations to pull us out.

- They don't commit adultery, Therefore, don't have abortions, and never catch STD's unless it's from a nasty toilet seat or bad blood transfusion. A Good conservative girl will marry you if she gets pregnant.. but how would she get pregnant if they don't ... Oh Yeah She was raped!

- They don't believe in affirmative action of any other type of favoritism's that disturbs our tradition system of the best job going to the best candidate - BUT they do believe in Nepotism and Crony ism which is the old fashioned way.

- They don't believe in Integration nor Diversity so I can join a country club and feel safe.

- They are never worried any more about Global warning now then they were worried about Smog, polluted water, or lead in Gasoline. Hey they GOT TO have some health secret we don't know about.

And hey as long as I don't do drugs , read pornography or make overseas calls to my cousin Mohammad, I am sure they will keep the Government off my back like they always promised.

Who needs Liberalism?


May 10, 2008 at 1:14 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Erik: That's right, they never do any of those wicked things that liberals do. Whenever a conservative gets caught driving drunk or cheating on his spouse, they start pouring out the euphemisms. It was "an error in judgment" or "an imperfection." Or they go the opposite direction, and go on TV and start sobbing and wailing and begging Jesus for forgiveness.

They sure do like affirmative action when it comes to college admissions. A guy could be dumber than a bag of hammers, but if he's a good athlete or a legacy, he's in.

May 10, 2008 at 10:02 AM  

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