Who Hijacked Our Country

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Sarah Palin Seriously Ill

Nobody knows what she’s suffering from. There hasn’t been a diagnosis. For that matter, she hasn’t even reported any physical symptoms yet.

But it’s just a matter of time.

As we all know, socialized medicine does NOT work. The quality of care is completely incompetent, delivered by faceless inept bureaucrats who are so damn busy watching the clock, they’re not paying any attention to the patients they’re operating on. You have to wait six months (or is it sixteen?) just to get a doctor’s appointment; and that’s for emergencies.

And those endless waiting periods in the emergency room are legendary. When a doctor does finally deign to come out and “help” the next person, he/she often trips over the corpses of those who died while they were waiting.

And the rationing. Hell, I’ll just come out and say it: Death Panels! You’re too old, too young, not politically correct, not productive enough — DIE!!!!

And now we find out that Sarah — Willingly! Knowingly! — has subjected herself to the excruciatingly decrepit pestilent medical “care” offered by those primitive Canadians.

Sarah, what were you thinking? Why on Earth would you do this? WHY??!?!?!?

God only knows what horrible side effects await poor Sarah. Medical symptoms that grew worse and worse while she was kept waiting by that so-called “doctor,” unwashed filthy medical instruments, wrong prescriptions — we have no idea what awful disease will rear its head, or when. Tomorrow, next week, next year…

Sarah Palin will be sorely missed by hundreds of late night comedians and millions of bloggers.

In other news: Joe Biden has assured Israel that “America will always be your bitch. When you say ‘Bend Over!’ we’ll say ‘How Low Sir?!?’”

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Anonymous Jess said...

Hehe, and she says it is irony now. I don't think she knows what that word means. You libruls just don't get it. As long as you are a republican you can do whatever the hell you want and NO ONE can call you on it.

:)) Ooh and Oso, if you post here, I may have the first post here too, so once again I may have beat you.

March 9, 2010 at 1:58 PM  
Blogger Holte Ender said...

When she used to hustle over the border to get her reasonably priced health care, she wasn't a media darling nor a millionaire, so now she's raking in the bucks, she can afford to get treated for whatever ails her right here in the USA, probably in Los Angeles with all her new Tonight Show friends.

March 9, 2010 at 2:15 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

You know Holte, I was talking about that to a friend of mine. So here is my new plan. I am going to become an overnight righty sensation, and gather up all the coin I can from unsuspecting rubes along with my praying for good health deal, I mentioned here before, when the HCR bill is signed. I will make a fortune and then give $ister $arah, Our Lady of perpetual victimhood a run for her money. I KNOW I am better looking and will just lie my ass off to get the rubes to like me more than her.

It will get her off the air and me on there, where I will suddenly have a nervous breakdown and become what I really am again. It is a win win for everyone after a little while. Gotta have a plan these days to beat them at their own game. :) I will have to learn teabagistanical language though. Since I am in school right now and start a new job next week, I'll slip it in during my lunch hour for a week, that should be enough time to come up to speed on all things kooky right?

March 9, 2010 at 2:52 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: That's right, I forgot. It's OK when conservatives do it (that's the all-encompassing rule that applies to every situation).

Holte: True, now that she can afford it, privatized medical care is the only way to go.

March 9, 2010 at 2:55 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: Good luck in your new enterprise. After you've become fluent in Teabagistanical, maybe you could make even more money writing "Teabag For Dummies." Uh oh, that title is kind of a redundancy.

March 9, 2010 at 2:59 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

LOL,I will have to call it something else. I have enough talented people around me a title would not be long in coming to me for a book. That and I would need a ghost writer, have to keep the economy growing and well, I cannot write for poop.

March 9, 2010 at 4:05 PM  
Blogger Teeluck said...

Say it isn't so....Sarah took health care from them....Socialists???

Hey Jess, Beach Bum is the perfect writer for your book.

March 9, 2010 at 7:45 PM  
Blogger Teeluck said...


March 9, 2010 at 7:47 PM  
Anonymous Ten Bears said...

[ sigh ] What to do, what to do... stick up for the bimbo, or point out the obvious... ?

Back in the sixties and early seventies when her parents were hustling she and her siblings across the border into The Yukon for health care, Sarah Palin WAS A CHILD! Had no control over those decisions.

March 9, 2010 at 8:08 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: I'll look forward to your book. You could paraphrase Ann Coulter for the title: "How to talk to a teabagger, if you must."

Teeluck: Yup, she's nothing but a damn socialist parasite.

Ten Bears: That bimbo needs all the trashing she can get, and then some. There's too much of a huge gap between what she preaches and what she practices, and most of the time she doesn't get called on it. As far as whether this took place back in the '60s, that story keeps changing. If you're interested, check out the blog "Palingates" linked in my left sidebar. Apparently there have been several versions of this story and when it happened, and she keeps changing it.

March 9, 2010 at 9:51 PM  
Blogger Lew Scannon said...

Biden may have stood up to Israel, but as long as we keep signing and sending the aid checks, it's all just window dressing.

March 10, 2010 at 3:28 AM  
Anonymous Jolly Roger said...

Apologists like Ten Bears prove yet again the old axiom: IOKIYAR.

Caribou Barbie was shown to be a flagrant waster of taxpayer money in Alaska, a flagrant spender of Rushpubliscum donors' money for things like silk boxers for the "Worst Dude," an absolute zero as a parent, and an incompetent dolt as Governor who used her office to settle personal scores-and then ran away crying when the heat got turned up on her. But to her brain-dead worshipers, none of it matters; they have an excuse/apology for every truth that comes out on their wet dream.

March 10, 2010 at 5:06 AM  
Blogger Holte Ender said...

JESS - I think you are onto something about being a righty, over-nighty sensation, they certainly seem to get all of the media attention. You must get elected to some government office i.e. local council or better, then be against it. Spend tax payers money like water and preach against waste, then quit half way through your term. The potential is enormous.

March 10, 2010 at 6:02 AM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

Doesn't anyone just hustle over the border anymore to score some herb? No standards. Hmph.

March 10, 2010 at 7:21 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Lew: That link I used, about Biden and Israel, got "updated" by Yahoo.com, and now it's a totally different story. The original story was Biden reassuring Israel that we'll always be there for them, and together we'll stand tall against that big bad Iran.

JR: That was my point too, that Palin has pulled so many scams and been so 2-faced about everything, usually without getting called on it. Her trips to Canada for medical care might have been when she was a child (the story keeps getting "revised"), but still, her whole attitude just shrieks "I can get away with it, but you can't."

Holte: Yes, the potential is endless. So many dumb people to con, so little time...

Randal: Don't worry, there's still plenty of that too. B.C. Bud is all the rage in northern Washington.

March 10, 2010 at 10:42 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Tee Luck, I could always go with the person that already has a published book, since that person knows what it takes. Just saying is all :) No offense meant to you Beach Bum, I am certain you would be great but....

Holte, I couldn't get elected dog catcher in my republican village. I am one of those godless, atheist LIBERALS and am well known at the city hall meetings. I would have to do a complete, whatever is spinning after 360, to be considered for anything here. I'm that one anti war protester at the traffic signal before you get into the mall that people threw things out the window at. That is the kind of person lives here.

Randal, we here in California don't need to venture outside of this beautiful state for nature's bounty. That is crazy talk right there, buy American dammit.

March 10, 2010 at 11:29 AM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

Palin's as healthy as it gets. The only treatment she needs is a half-gallon of prune juice a day.

Hey, she wouldn't have much time left for spouting nonsense.

March 10, 2010 at 2:11 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

SW: Ah, the old prune juice treatment. Theoretically, she wouldn't be able to spout out of both ends at the same time.

March 10, 2010 at 2:19 PM  
Anonymous Screamin' Mimi said...

Prune juice therapy, right. But you'd go into the bathroom to see what had become of her, and all there would be left is her glasses lying on the tiles. Boo-hoo.

It really seriously needs to come to everyone's attention that Miss Caribou only objects to "Socialism" (or anything else, for that matter) if it isn't about HER. And this is a person that some see as a great hope for the future? I don't get it, and that's the truth.

March 10, 2010 at 3:45 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

SM: Nothing left but her glasses lying on the tiles -- LOL.

If she's our "hope" for the future, then I want the Rapture to hurry up and get here.

March 10, 2010 at 4:00 PM  
Blogger kimc said...

I'm kindof hoping that the Rapture takes ALL fundamentalists off of Earth. Then we could have real peace and prosperity! Won't they be surprised, looking down from their clouds, to see us all doing well here because no one is as trigger-happy, dishonest, and selfish as a Fundamentalist.

March 13, 2010 at 1:37 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

kimc: And on top of all that, the rest of us could have their stuff.

March 13, 2010 at 1:43 PM  
Blogger Paul and Kerry said...

We all need to stop even mentioning Sarahs name. All it does is create a revenue stream for her.

I think we all know she is just not a very intellegent women. Or is she? She is making millions because this very conversation.

Stop it!

March 15, 2010 at 8:46 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

But she makes such good fodder for satire. But you're right; she's laughing all the way to the bank.

March 15, 2010 at 9:31 PM  

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