Who Hijacked Our Country

Saturday, April 09, 2011

Something’s Rotten in Wisconsin

There are some interesting parallels between Prossergate and Watergate. The more things change...Remember when Richard Nixon’s secretary, Rose Mary Woods, accidentally erased eighteen incriminating minutes from one of the Watergate tapes?

It was the weirdest thing. She was sitting at her desk, typing while practicing Yoga, as always. Without realizing it, she got into some sort of bizarre Yoga posture that only a few advanced Yogis in India are capable of doing. She straightened out one leg and reached her foot way waaaayy out there, much further than the length of her leg. Her toe accidentally pushed against the Erase button on the tape recorder that contained one of Nixon’s tapes that he didn’t want released.

She continued typing away blissfully in that same position. Eighteen minutes later she decided to change positions. And that was when she discovered — to her utter horror! — that her toe had been resting on the Erase button for that entire eighteen minutes. “Oh!” she gasped. “What ever have I done??!?!?!?”

Now, fast forward 38 years, and see Rose Mary Woods morph into Waukesha County Clerk Kathy Nickolaus.

As you know, Wisconsin Supreme Court Justice David Prosser — one of Scott Walker’s fellow Kochsuckers — was up for re-election. It was supposed to be a shoe-in, since nobody had even heard of his opponent, JoAnne Kloppenburg. And these state court re-elections are usually routine and uneventful. The public yawns and the incumbent wins.

But because of the huge backlash against Wisconsin’s Republican prostitutes for destroying labor unions — as they were ordered to do by their pimps, the Koch Brothers — the vote was a tie. Kloppenburg was several hundred votes ahead, and a recount would be necessary.

And then — funny story — Waukesha County Clerk Kathy Nickolaus said to herself: “Hey, what’s that big box under the table? I never noticed it before. I’d better have a look. Why, raise my rent! There are 14,000 ballots that haven’t been counted yet. OOPS!”

And by a sheer coincidence, Waukesha County just happens to be the most conservative county in Wisconsin. Most of these uncounted votes are certain to be for David Prosser. We don’t even need a recount. Case closed. Next.

Other coincidences include:

Kathy Nickolaus worked for David Prosser when he was in the Wisconsin State Assembly.

In 2001 Kathy Nickolaus received immunity for testifying about her own role in a campaign scandal.

Kathy Nickolaus has already been audited for removing official election data from the county computer network and installing it on her personal computer.

Sometimes, when a country is notorious for its festering corruption, a UN-sponsored human rights group will monitor the elections in that country. When the upcoming recall elections are held in Wisconsin — and Ohio and Indiana and Florida and Michigan — we need the United Nations to watch very very closely.


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11 Comments:

Blogger jadedj said...

I have been out of it the last few days. Is this crap being challenged?

April 9, 2011 at 6:45 AM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

The good thing about being a banana republic is that once we've dropped all our bombs, we'll finally be free to scrounge for scraps in a swanky Hawaiian shirt.

April 9, 2011 at 6:51 AM  
Blogger J. Marquis said...

Yeah, something is rotten in Wisconsin. I can smell it out here two time zones to the west.

April 9, 2011 at 7:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In Ohio one of the register of voters turned out to be part of the state GOP committee when there was a questionable vote count in 2004. Isn't there supposed to conflict in interest laws?

Erik

April 9, 2011 at 3:43 PM  
Blogger Snave said...

This sounds like some lousy set-up to me. Time for some serious investigating. Let's get about 80,000 people back to the capital!

April 9, 2011 at 7:39 PM  
Blogger Suzan said...

I'll second that emotion, sweetheart.

Not that monitoring these thugs will change their behavior or do anything else to actually return the democratic virtue (or lack today thereof) that used to be taken for granted about all elections.

Ah to be in a country (once again) that actually ensured votes being counted fairly (and people not thinking it odd or unnecessary).

April 9, 2011 at 7:52 PM  
Anonymous Jolly Roger said...

And the only thing the Jonestowners can say is "The DEMMYCRAT sez her count is good!!!" As if people working for her (1.) might not want to look like criminals themselves, or (2.) know exactly what she did with that data when she took it over and put it on her PC.

April 9, 2011 at 8:06 PM  
Blogger Kevin said...

No matter how inept, incompetent, or just plain corrupt, the GOP keep getting these candidates elected. Hmmmmmm.

April 10, 2011 at 6:43 AM  
Blogger Beekeepers Apprentice said...

You know, having UN peacekeepers watching over our elections in certain areas...that's a good idea.

April 10, 2011 at 7:55 AM  
Anonymous Thomas said...

Why is it that the unpunished conflict of interest election shenanigans always break in the Republicans' favor?

April 10, 2011 at 4:13 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

jadedj: If nothing else, this will keep the voters riled up enough to recall Walker and the rest of those Kochsuckers.

Randal: Banana republics, gotta love 'em.

J: The stench is probably carrying all the way across the Pacific.

Erik: Those conflict of interest laws are so quaint, so 1900s.

Snave: We've gotta keep these fires burning; keep the voters pissed off so they'll do something.

Suzan: "to be in a country (once again) that actually ensured votes being counted fairly." One can dream :)

JR: Can't reason with a Jonestowner.

Kevin: It's getting curiouser and curiouser.

Bee: I think we need to swallow our pride and let the UN monitor our elections, just like they do with Nigeria, Venezuela, Belarus...

Thomas: Good question.

April 11, 2011 at 12:07 PM  

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