Who Hijacked Our Country

Friday, December 07, 2012

Ellen DeGeneres Wants to Ram her Lesbian Christmas Down America’s Throat

Fellow Christians, the unthinkable has finally happened:  the War on Christmas and the Homosexual Agenda have joined forces to create America’s Worst Nightmare — a Lesbian Christmas!

Ellen DeGeneres and JCPenney have collaborated on this Satanic mockery of everything America stands for.  Fortunately, a God-fearing Christian group — One Million Moms — is organizing a crusade against this debauchery.

In case you’re skeptical of One Million Moms — their motives, their credentials — they’re an offshoot of the American Family Association.  So rest assured:   whatever crusade they’re undertaking at the moment, God’s Love is smiling down upon us.

JC Penney has defied the will of America’s snake-handling Biblehumping community by running a TV commercial featuring Ellen DeGeneres, a known lesbian.  If you love America and Christmas  — and hate homosexuals, as Jesus commanded — please join One Million Moms in their boycott of JC Penney.

If you love Jesus, you must prove it by signing up for the boycott at the One Million Moms website.

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Blogger Randal Graves said...

Lesbian Christmas is a concept records just waiting to be recorded.

December 7, 2012 at 11:39 AM  
Blogger S.W. Anderson said...

This million moms is the best comedy troupe since Saturday Night Live. And the best response to their levity is for the sane rest of us to laugh at them, every chance we get.

December 7, 2012 at 7:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They can always pray for a flood to wipe her and her kind away. Would be more effective! and so old testament


December 8, 2012 at 12:30 AM  
Blogger Demeur said...

What's next Santa is a perv? He does like to hang around kids.

December 8, 2012 at 8:08 AM  
Blogger Jerry Critter said...

Santa? Hummmmmm. He is always putting kids on his lap. What is that all about?

December 8, 2012 at 9:46 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Randal: It could be a group name. They can be the opening act for Screaming Fetus.

SW: It's almost sad when a group is this funny without even knowing it.

Erik: That method has mixed results. The last time they tried it, the flood wiped out a bunch of Biblehumpers instead.

Demeur: Oh my God, now that you mention it...

Jerry: It gets even more suspicious when Santa says to the kid on his lap, "let's talk about the first thing that pops up."

December 8, 2012 at 1:16 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

OMM is about 40k people and some of are are not moms but we subscribe to their email list for the fun of it. They think they have been successful at boycotting but happily they have not.

December 8, 2012 at 5:59 PM  
Anonymous Carlos said...

Just took a glance at the One Millions (well, not really) Bigots web site...holy shit. If they spent half as much time serving their community and doing truly Jesusy shit as they did whining about Jiffy lube and Skittles commercials, our society might actually be a tad better. What a bunch of inbred, brainwashed, misguided fucks.

December 9, 2012 at 3:01 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: I'm surprised there are even 40,000 people in that group. I thought it was probably some wacko sitting in his attic, simulating the whole thing from his keyboard.

Carlos: LOL. My sentiments exactly.

December 9, 2012 at 2:00 PM  
Anonymous Jolly Roger said...

Damn lesbers, always trying to shove their heathen ways down our throats like a dil....l pickle or something.

December 9, 2012 at 6:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought you were supposed to hate the sin but love the sinner?


December 9, 2012 at 9:42 PM  
Blogger Hugh G Rekshonn said...

I've got something for all those Lesbos, oh yeah!

Say my name bishe !

December 10, 2012 at 5:52 AM  
Blogger Life As I Know It Now said...

I guess I better get over to JCPenny's to shop :)

December 10, 2012 at 6:22 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

JR: Yup, them lesbers and their dill somethings.

Erik: Nah, that's only when a Republican politician or televangelist gets caught sinning. All the rest of the time, they hate the sinner.

Life: Me too.

December 10, 2012 at 1:29 PM  

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