Who Hijacked Our Country

Friday, February 26, 2016

Dow Chemical Grief-Stricken over Scalia's Death

Sorry, robber barons — Mitch McConnell and his fellow prostitutes won't be able to help you this time.

Dow Chemical has been facing a long-standing $835 million class action suit over price-fixing.  The company was counting on the Supreme Court, i.e. the Corporate Five, to dismiss the suit, as per Standard Operating Procedure.  But now that the greasiest sickfuck-est of them all has finally died, Dow Chemical has decided to settle the case.

A Dow spokesperson has announced that the court's current lineup has “increased the likelihood for unfavorable outcomes for business involved in class action suits.”

Robert Peck of the Center for Constitutional Litigation said “I think most corporations facing class actions regarded Justice Scalia as a friend.  He has been a thoroughly consistent vote on their side of the equation.”

Yes, if by “friend” you mean corrupt bribe-taking prostitute with corporate jism smeared all over his face.

All Right!!!  Maybe this will be a new trend.  Let the dominoes start falling.  This could be the start of something beautiful.

Labels: ,


Blogger One Fly said...

Imagine that! Being too damn nice.

February 27, 2016 at 6:15 AM  
Blogger Jim Marquis said...

Great title, Tom.

February 27, 2016 at 10:25 AM  
Blogger Cirze said...

I want to see some grown men crying!

Thanks, sweetie. You win the day's headline award.

February 28, 2016 at 12:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe Dow can join up with Monsanto and buy shares in Clarence Thomas


February 28, 2016 at 2:40 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

One Fly: It would be nice, that's for sure.

Jim: Thanks.

Cirze: Since corporations are people, I guess they can cry and be grief stricken.

Erik: LOL. I don't know if Clarence Thomas has any more shares available, since every lobbyist in the universe already owns a few pieces of him.

February 28, 2016 at 8:22 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home