Obama: “If You Want Something Done Right, Do It Yourself!”

After a year of paralysis, President Obama has finally realized that the hired help just isn’t working out. Senate Republicans have been sitting there all year with their arms crossed and their lower lips thrust out, stamping their feet and screaming “NO” in unison. And the Democrats have spent a year doing their hilarious imitation of a deer caught in the headlights. Except it isn’t funny any more.

When you have a dumb cashier who can’t figure out how to operate the cash register, the store owner eventually has to come over and work the cash register himself. And this is what Obama is finally doing.

He’s putting together his own health care reform legislation. It’ll be a comprehensive bill, designed to bridge the differences between the bills in the House and Senate. And this bill is being written in a way that it can be attached to a budget bill and avoid a filibuster. Just 51 votes — not 60 — is all it’ll take to pass it. Reconciliation! Yay!

Now — Can we find fifty-one Senate Democrats with the spines and cojones to vote Yes? Whatever amount of armtwisting and blackmailing is required: Do It!!

The president’s proposed bill is expected to be posted online this Monday.