Who Hijacked Our Country

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Tom DeLay: Phantom Pain

The House of Representatives is undergoing the same phantom pain that befalls accident victims and wounded soldiers. The diseased, gangrenous bodypart (Tom DeLay) has been amputated, and yet you'd swear it was still here.

Because of his indictment, The Hammeroid officially stepped down on 9/28 from his leadership post. And yet…he’s still using an office in the leadership suite, he’s still presiding over meetings with committee chairmen and he still lobbies members during key votes.

He also continues to maintain the House schedule, and he’s still sending memos to representatives. And on his most recent court appearances in Austin two weeks ago he was accompanied by three bodyguards from the Capitol Hill police force.

He’s kind of like Bruce Willis in that move where he doesn’t know he’s dead.

Uh…Hellooo!!!! Sleazeball!! Go!! You’ve been amputated. Exorcised. Hit the road. Better yet, start practicing some role-playing as the abused wife. It’ll be good training for your upcoming prison stint.

DeLay’s continued presence in the House is causing dissent within the ranks. Some reps are wearing hammer-shaped lapel pins to show their solidarity.

Others are less supportive. One House Republican — who didn’t want to be named — said “My issue is having an indicted former leader hanging around the leadership offices. This guy did so much good work getting us into the majority. Why does he want to stick around? He’s not helping us.”

Rep. Christopher Shays (R-Conn.) said “Tom DeLay should not be in a position of authority. He should not be calling the shots or driving the agenda, and if he is, that would be unfortunate.”

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