Who Hijacked Our Country

Friday, October 05, 2007

Larry Craig Should Stay in the Senate

Larry Craig should not resign, as those whiny liberals keep hoping he’ll do. He needs to finish what he started and remain in the Senate until his term us up in 2008. He’s been slandered and vilified by the leftwing media and he should stay and fight for his reputation. Come on, give him a break. He just has a “wide stance” and he happened to be jiggling his feet that fateful evening in Minnesota.

Not too convincing, eh? OK, Take Two: I want that spineless two-faced asshole to stay and stay and stay. Let’s keep him in the spotlight from now through November 2008 — front and center. Those Biblehumping fire-and-brimstoners created this judgmental hateful paranoid atmosphere that’s been smothering our country for decades. Now they’ve been hoisted on their own petard. It’s about F#ckin’ time.

These bookburning snakehandling shitheads have made their bed, and now they need to lie in it and fester in it. Another Roadside Attraction — look, it’s Larry Craig, the Human Albatross. See him rotting and putrefying around the necks of the Salem Witch Hunters. See them flailing and thrashing as they fall deeper and deeper into the muck.

The Spanish Inquisitors are in sort of a touchy position. Should they urge Craig to resign, and show everyone what a bunch of spineless fair-weather friends they really are? Or should they circle the wagons and protect their buddy, and show the world what a bunch of hypocritical assholes they are? “God Hates Fags! Er, I mean, unless it’s one of OUR fags, uh, what I meant was…”

AWKWARD!

Which way to turn? What Would Jerry Falwell Do?

Come on Biblewipes, let’s see you do some twisting and squirming.

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17 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree. I want this asshole in front of the Senate Ethics Committee explain his actions. Get the popcorn!

October 5, 2007 at 5:53 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Vice: True, he needs to explain himself and be accountable. The public has a right to know which of his personalities to believe: the righteous Biblethumper or the fallen sinner. I'll take some booze along with that popcorn.

October 5, 2007 at 6:22 PM  
Blogger Miss Kitty said...

At first I was elated that another GOP-er had been caught in his hypocrisy, but I realized that maybe if he stays the "Biblewipes" (love that phrase) will be FORCED to deal with the gay people in their own flock. The GOP reaction to the whole Craig/gay debacle has been like Ahmadinejad's: "We have no homosexuals...[we] don't know what you're talking about." So I'm glad you said this, Tom. I think the left is really making the wrong move on this. Those of us who are for kindness and tolerance of gays and lesbians should encourage Craig to stay and serve out his term, maybe see if he can get re-elected...and see how the GOP takes it. And maybe poor Larry will come out in the meantime. (No WAY he's straight...I thought that he was gay long before this whole scandal broke.)

October 5, 2007 at 7:27 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Miss Kitty: I think if he stays it'll put his fellow wingnuts in a really awkward position, which is what they need. So many conservative VIPs have been outed, and then they disappear from the headlines. But these moralists need to be forced to choose one or the other. If homosexuality (and other victimless "crimes") is wrong, then the moralists need to condemn their own friends and associates along with all those faceless "other people." Or if they want to be open-minded and forgiving toward Larry Craig, they need to extend that attitude towards everybody else. They can't have it both ways.

October 5, 2007 at 8:46 PM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

Tom, your post and the other commenters are spot on, but I really wish we'd be more aggressive on this thing, too, harshly pointing out the hypocrisy of Craig, Vitter, etc etc. Again, it seems like the Dems are so afraid of pissing off that nebulous group of "values voters," toeing the line so they offend the least amount of people.

At the end of the day, it's just one (two, three, five, twenty-seven, plus Gannon/Guckert) guy, but when there's a body of evidence that the wingnuts are wrong on EVERY social issue...but then again, 70% of America wants us out of Iraq and the Dems are afraid of the 30%, so forget all the hot air I just said.

October 6, 2007 at 4:46 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Randal: Yeah, it's amazing how that 30% has such a stranglehold on the other 70% and the Democrats who are supposedly "representing" them. I don't know what the Democrats are so afraid of. Maybe they're afraid of some very powerful groups (like Freedom's Watch, PNAC, etc.) or maybe they're just afraid of their own shadow. Who knows.

October 6, 2007 at 11:22 AM  
Blogger Christopher said...

I think it's a riot that the Men's room at Minneapolis-St. Paul Int'l Airport is now a tourist destination. LOL!

October 6, 2007 at 11:45 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Christopher: Yeah, I couldn't believe that when I read about it. Maybe Craig could host it in person if he leaves the senate.

October 6, 2007 at 11:56 AM  
Blogger Damien said...

You know he could have just said that he was an emotional shitter or that he had bad potty training.
Next time I have to use a public toilet I'm cementing my feet to the floor and looking straight ahead, get in get out.

October 6, 2007 at 2:50 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Damien: That's funny, I tend to be always jiggling my feet and drumming my fingers. I'll have to remember to sit perfectly still when I'm in a men's room stall.

October 6, 2007 at 2:55 PM  
Blogger PoliShifter said...

I think he should stay and Vitter should be the one going.

I love watching the Rethugs eat their own. Will be awesome to see if his "collegues" try to shame him into leaving, dragging up his allgations of past diddling page boys.

I think Craig should stay defiant and drag Vitter into it saying Vitter engaged in Prostitution, clearly broke the law, and while Craig may like to blow men in bathroom stalls, Vitte wheres frickin' diapers.

Hell, let's get Mark Foley and Ted Haggard to moderate.

October 6, 2007 at 6:56 PM  
Blogger PoliShifter said...

Hi Tom,

Jolly Roger over at Reconstitution has a post up linking to an article where Mike Jones (Ted Haggard's concubine) says Senator Craig came to see him too...

October 6, 2007 at 7:07 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

PoliShifter: Yeah, it'll be great watching the wingnuts try to decide whether to eat their own or to protect their own while still condemning millions of others who are "guilty" of the same thing. If the Democrats' strategists are smart they'll bring all these players into the spotlight and make them squirm in front of all those "values" voters.

I'll check out the post at Reconstitution.

October 6, 2007 at 7:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Randal: Yeah, it's amazing how that 30% has such a stranglehold on the other 70%

***************************
That's because when the 30% wave the fear of terrorism, most of the other 70% turn tail and run.

As for Larry Craig all he has to do is get down on one knee and beg for forgiveness.

It has worked so often.

Erik

October 6, 2007 at 11:39 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Erik: Unfortunately that 30% knows which buttons to push. They've memorized that Goebbels quote from the 1930s and they put it to maximum use. It works every time because the same dunces keep falling for it.

October 7, 2007 at 1:23 AM  
Blogger Snave said...

Maybe they will waterboard him as a means to get him to quit. You know they must just HATE having him still hanging around...! Anything that makes the GOP squirm and lose what little credibility it has left is fine with me. Especially if these things can be used to get fewer people to vote Republican in 2008. But I agree, the Dems need to take a more aggressive stance on the GOP hypocrites... the left is basically giving these idiots a free ride when we should be absolutely crucifying them on the cross of their own ineptitude and hypocrisy.

For some reason in America, when it comes to Christianity, everyone puts on the kid gloves and things are not talked about or criticized because then it is viewed as an "attack on religion". Whatever... I think it's time people began speaking up about how asinine and ugly these GOP politicians are, and about making honesty and tolerance into real campaign issues.

October 9, 2007 at 11:27 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Snave: Good comment. I don't know who to be madder at, two-faced Republican or their Democratic enablers.

We've all known people with "strong personalities" -- those people who are loud and pushy and manipulative; they know exactly which buttons to push, which soundbites to use. It seems like the Democrats are this little wishy-washy geek who's afraid to say Boo, because every time he does this loudmouth Republican will come roaring back with a well-aimed platitude. If we criticize Larry Craig we're attacking Christianity. If we criticize CEOs' huge salaries we're engaging in class warfare. Etc.

October 9, 2007 at 11:57 AM  

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