Who Hijacked Our Country

Monday, August 25, 2008

Ted Stevens: Dick Cheney’s Achilles Heel?

America’s slipperiest criminal has been untouchable for almost eight years. He can bribe the Supreme Court into ruling that he doesn’t have to reveal any information about those secret energy meetings. And look at the results of those meetings. How’d that work out for us?

He thinks torturing prisoners is even more American than apple pie and motherhood. Will he still think so after he becomes a prisoner?

And he has more undisclosed locations than any ten underworld figures.

But now one of his stooges might start singing.

The upcoming trial of Ted Stevens will show that Cheney was up to his eyeballs (or whatever androids see with) in Stevens’ oil pipeline scandal. All kinds of information ought to be uncovered.

Like most criminals, Stevens might roll over and start naming names. Ted Stevens and Dick Cheney (and a few of the other misfits) spending their doddering years in prison — one can dream anyway.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

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Blogger Randal Graves said...

If Cheney served one minute in jail I'd throw a goddamn party. That's who should be number one on the FBI's Most Wanted.

August 25, 2008 at 6:21 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Randal: I'd be partying too if that asshole served one minute in jail. But one can hope.

August 25, 2008 at 10:31 AM  
Blogger Snave said...

If Cheney was in prison for one minute, would it be enough timre for some great big muscle-bound prisoner to make Cheney his girlfriend?

August 25, 2008 at 8:13 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Snave: Yes, the authorities would have to arrange that. One 300-pound Speedy Gonzalez coming up.

August 25, 2008 at 8:16 PM  
Blogger J. Marquis said...

I get the feeling anybody who rolls over on Cheney might end up substantially dead.

August 25, 2008 at 8:51 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

J: Either that or he'll find a horse's head on his pillow.

August 25, 2008 at 9:55 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

NOTE: I'll be away for the next day and a half with no computer access (Thank God!). I hope you'll still comment, but I won't have a chance to publish any comments until tomorrow night.

August 26, 2008 at 8:17 AM  
Blogger Lew Scannon said...

My guess is that every criminal in the Bush administration will receive a pardon on the way out, if Obama wins. If McCain wins, there'll be no prosecution whatsoever, and the corruption will continue, unabated.

August 26, 2008 at 3:10 PM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

"And he has more undisclosed locations than any ten underworld figures."

I have long considered Cheney to be an undisclosed location. Remote, too.

August 26, 2008 at 7:55 PM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

Re: Cheney in jail. You watch; in the unlikely event he winds up being sentenced to time in stir, he'll start complaining about heart palpitations. Then, he'll either end up at a hospital, in private quarters at Club Fed, or both.

August 26, 2008 at 7:58 PM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

I hope you're not performing any radical environmentalism such as enjoying the great outdoors, for that would simply be unpatriotic.

August 27, 2008 at 1:11 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Lew: Unfortunately that sounds like an accurate prediction.

SW: Probably true. If he spends any time in prison (unlikely) his pacemaker will start acting up and he'll be moved to a private suite.

Randal: Yes, I committed the abomindable sin of enjoying the environment for a day -- the southwest corner of Washington. It perverts people, makes them start questioning the military industrial complex and gives one the urge to partake in illicit substances. Oh my God, what's happened to me? Somebody needs to cut down all those trees and build condos and industrial parks on that coastline, before America's moral fiber has completely vanished.

August 27, 2008 at 6:02 PM  

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