Extra! Extra! Read All About It! Sarah Palin’s Future Grandchild Might Be African-American!
OK, first — AHEM! — a few disclaimers. Obviously I have no idea whether there's any truth whatsoever to this rumor. Check out the YouTube link at the bottom of this post and see what you think.
Second, I've always had nothing but contempt for those mindless tabloid journals and the people who read them. And now I'm stooping to their level. Oh My God, I've become what I hate!
But there's a war going on — a culture war. And War is Hell.
Until a week or two ago, the whole “culture wars” / “fire and brimstone” garbage had a lower profile than usual. Millions of Biblestains were threatening to stay home on Election Day because McCain isn't righteous or hateful enough. For awhile there, it looked like we might actually have an election where ISSUES would be discussed. You know — millions of people in danger of losing their homes; America being swallowed up by Iraqmire; the banking, oil and pharmaceutical industries (among others) running rampant with no oversight or accountability. That kind of thing.
But thanks to the Republican powerbrokers, a rightwing Biblespouting trophy-hunting “global-warming-is-a-myth” nutcase is on the ticket. (If you think this was McCain’s choice, I can get you a great deal on some oceanfront property in South Dakota.)
Whew! Now we don’t have to discuss the issues after all. That was close. McCain can't find Iraq and Pakistan on a map; can't even tell the difference between a middle school and a VA hospital. How can he possibly debate the issues with Obama?
Problem solved. Once again, all the Right has to do is spit out their favorite soundbites — Abortion! Gay Marriage! Drill For Oil Now! — and millions of knuckledraggers will slither out from under their rocks and go to the polls on Election Day.
But there's a risk to pounding the Bible and playing the God Card: you might get hoisted on your own petard. For instance — William Bennett, Newt Gingrich, Jon Livingston, Jim Bakker, Jimmy Swaggart (to name just a few). And now Sarah Palin.
She doesn’t appear to be quite the lily-white Bible Queen she’s pretending to be. Affairs. A daughter pregnant out of wedlock. Using her political influence as a billy club (is that what Jesus would do?). Trophy hunting and trying to derail every environmental and species-protection law that she possibly can. Didn’t the Bible mention something about Man having stewardship over the land and God’s creatures? Or maybe Jesus said “if it moves, shoot it!”
The Palin family has brought on all of these tabloid rumors by their own holier-than-though Bible spouting. When somebody preaches one thing and practices the opposite, it becomes an issue.
If the public found out that the president of Greenpeace likes to hunt endangered species when nobody’s looking, the anti-environment crowd would have a field day with it. And they'd be right.
And continuing with that zany comparison: environmentalists — unlike Biblehumpers — would NOT be circling the wagons and rallying around the president of Greenpeace and saying “uh, ahem [sputter] but this is different, it’s not the same thing…that F#$%&!# media…”
OK, on with the show! Here is the link to the video.
Yes these are vicious rumors and dirty tactics. Lee Atwater and Karl Rove don’t have a patent on the dirty tricks they invented. For the past two presidential elections, the Democrats showed up at a gunfight and brought a pocket knife. Not this time.