Who Hijacked Our Country

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

FINALLY — An Explanation for Mass Bird Deaths

Forget all those newfangled scientific theories. Thousands of birds and other animals have died because: their deaths were God’s punishment for the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.

This comes from Evangelist Cindy Jacobs. The Lord has punished animals all over the world because of America’s Homosexual Agenda. In Cindy Jacobs’ own words:

“According to biblical principles, marriage is between a man and a woman, so we have to say 'what happens when a nation makes a decision that’s against God's principles?' Well, often what happens is that nature itself will begin to talk to us — for instance, violent storms, flooding.”

Huh? But I thought violent storms were caused when rival gods were fighting in the sky.

(The linked article has a YouTube video of Cindy Jacobs’ words of wisdom.)

Last November, Cindy Jacobs told a Latino audience that if they voted for candidates who oppose gay marriage, God would reward them with immigration reform.

OK, my head hurts. That’s all for today.

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Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

Aha! Jacobs beat Pat Robertson to the punch. He's really slipping.

January 11, 2011 at 11:39 PM  
Anonymous Carlos said...

Jesus H. Chris. What a fucking nut. She strikes me as mildly retarded in the video where she tells us dummies why God killed them thar purty, innocent Arkansan birdies and fishies on account of peter puffin' and muff divin' weren't amongst the Almighty's favorite things.

January 12, 2011 at 2:54 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

SW: There seems to be a new crop of fire-and-brimstoners -- Cindy Jacobs, Bryan Fischer -- leaving the Pat Robertsons in the dust.

Carlos: And on top of that, she stole Tammy Fay Bakker's wig.

January 12, 2011 at 1:18 PM  

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