Who Hijacked Our Country

Thursday, February 03, 2011

Who Cares About Those Swarthy Icky Egyptians?? What Does This Uprising Mean for AMERICA???

Sick jokes aside, that’s exactly the “thinking” (using the term loosely) of millions of tiny-minded, self-absorbed bigoted Americans. “How does this affect ME?” “What about America’s future influence in the Middle East?” “Who lost Egypt?!?!?”

According to Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity and the dumbfucks who listen to them, Egypt is setting itself on fire just to piss off Americans. Damn it, our economy is just starting to improve, and now those lowly peasants over there have to start carrying on about something. What the fuck is their problem anyway??? OUR way of life is in jeopardy!

Nicholas Burns, one of Dumbya’s former henchmen, said:

“The consequences of instability in Egypt to the United States are really important. The strategic interests of the United States are on the line.”

Damn right. First things first. Who cares about millions of pissed off desperate people living on top of a powder keg? What about US???

It’s ironic that the same rightwing teabagfucks who are always shouting about “Freedom!” are now scared shitless that some of that freedom might actually be achieved by millions of lowly Third World peasants. “Are those people ready for democracy?” “Mubarak has been our staunch ally. We need him.” “What if their government becomes a Muslim police state?” “The Muslim Brotherhood!”

Part of the Right’s justification for invading Iraq — not that they actually meant any of it — was that we were sowing the seeds of democracy. The Iraqi war would be a cakewalk, and after that, little democracies would spring up all over the Middle East like flowers blooming on a dewy meadow.

And now, some of those democracies actually are blooming (not because we invaded and occupied Iraq). Only instead of delicate flowers, it’s millions of people marching and shouting and throwing rocks and Molotov cocktails at each other. WTF???

Democracy is supposed to be all neat and tidy and come wrapped in a pretty little ribbon. And most important of all, it has to meet Wall Street’s approval.

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Blogger MRMacrum said...

Well given the sterile and clean rundown of our own struggle to overcome the tyrannical King George the third, is it any wonder we cannot get our tiny minds around the fact that with the exceptions of Christians and Jews from Europe, Democracy is an ugly process among the unwashed masses who were not blessed by our saviour at birth.

Of course the Egyptians are only doing this to make us angry. Everything makes us angry. It is indeed a worldwide conspiracy to take away all that we have managed to take away from the rest of the World. Come on, isn't sending idealistic pinko youngsters over there to build sewage systems and show them how to plant adulterated seed enough? Somebody has to be top dog and since God told us it was us, then well, the rest of the World will just have to fall in line.

February 3, 2011 at 4:22 AM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

Regardless of ideological bent, talking hairpiece or childish scribbler, the two dominant threads appear to be (both coming, of course, from How Does This Affect America) are 1)what about my money & 2)oh shit, another place for terrorists to hang out.

February 3, 2011 at 5:30 AM  
Blogger Dave Dubya said...

The open secret is the Right hates democracy, here, there, and everywhere.

They do love fear though. OMG!! Here comes the global Islamic Caliphate!!

February 3, 2011 at 8:29 AM  
Blogger TomCat said...

RepubliSpeak Dictionary
Democracy: the right to be exploited by criminal corporations

February 3, 2011 at 10:06 AM  
Blogger Goodtime Charlie said...

I had a look at the Beck clip that that Daily Beast article linked to. I watched the whole thing; remind me never to do that again. I guess it's a testament to the first amendment that a major "news" network will give this idiot a platform from which to peddle his snake oil night after night while his militantly ignorant audience laps it up. I'd like to know what his prescription is, or whether he has only dire predictions to offer, but I don't have the stomach to watch enough of his program to find out.

Mubarak is on his way out and Egypt may very well become a Muslim police state, although that's only one of several possible scenarios. Egypt in 2011 is not Iran in 1979 (but it might be Poland in 1988). Given the reports of increasing chaos and violence, I think the most likely scenario is that the military will take power, saying that they are the only institution that can restore order, and if that happens I hope they will eventually engineer some sort of transition to a pluralistic system (that may or may not look like a western democracy). But who am I to make predictions? I'm not Glenn Beck, after all.

Like it or not, the US is not going to choose what a future Egypt is going to look like. That will be decided by Egyptians, if we actually believe any of our own rhetoric about freedom and self-determination. We may as well get used to the idea that the Muslim Brotherhood will very probably play some role, and also recognize that the Muslim Brotherhood is not the Taliban. Turkey is currently run by an Islamist party but I don't see any moves to toss them out of NATO because of that. The only thing we get to choose is whether or not we want to be on the right side of history.

February 3, 2011 at 2:20 PM  
Blogger jadedj said...

So what's the beef with conservative talking heads? Is it not the right of all people to choose their own destiny?

In essence, and by rights, it is none of our Goddamn business what the Egyptians do. Therein lies the mis-guided attitude of many Americans...the idea that we have the right to mind others affairs. If it doesn't go the way we want it to go, toughski shitski.

Arrogance personified.

February 3, 2011 at 4:02 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

MRM: You're right, our Founding Fathers were all dignified and cleancut. They just sat around making lofty statements all day. Why can't those primitive people in Egypt do it that way :)

Randal: And on top of that, those Egyptian riffraff have pushed Lindsay Lohan and Lady Gaga out of the headlines.

Dave: We'll have to liberate Egypt. We'll fight them over there so we don't have to fight them over here.

TC: Ah yes, I remember that right being clearly spelled out in the Constitution.

GC: I doubt if Beck or any other rightwing talking heads have any solutions. All they want to do is sabotage everything Obama tries to do. If they end up taking down the whole country in the process, oh well, it was worth it.

I guess snake oil sales is a lucrative business, since there are so many gullible people out there who keep buying it.

I agree, the Egyptian military might have to take over, to an extent, just to allow for an orderly transition.

jadedj: People choosing their own destiny? Nah, only VIPs and CEOs get to do that.

February 4, 2011 at 12:12 AM  
Anonymous S.W. Anderson said...

Yes, what if the world gave a major event and the U.S. was beside the point? Can't have that. What would the defense industry say?

How predictable, that the rabid right would try to make political hay here about what's going on in Egypt. When it comes to trying to demonize Obama, anything, no matter how contrived and absurd, will do.

February 4, 2011 at 12:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


And here I thought it was only CEO's geting to choose.

February 4, 2011 at 8:10 AM  

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