Who Hijacked Our Country

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Congress’ Approval Rating has SKYROCKETED!

Poor President Obama.  One of his biggest campaign themes has been bashing Congress.  With a nine percent approval rating, what’s not to bash?

But the tables have been turned, and now Congress’ approval rating has nearly doubled — to seventeen percent.  Whoa!  Hold the phone!

Congress is enjoying this surge in their popularity because our legislators actually [gasp] PASSED two important bills regarding student loans and transportation projects.  After the vote, a spokesman for John Boehner (R—Jack Daniels) tweeted:

“House votes 373-52 to screw up White House talking points.”

OK, rub it in.  But he’s right.  With their popularity almost doubled, Congress is clearly too well liked and respected to be used as a punching bag.

I used to get beaten up every day at school.  Beatdowns, having buckets of God-knows-what poured on me — school was a nightmare.  But then I started getting more popular, and now all they do is call me names and throw spitballs at me.  I just love my new popularity.  I'm In.  They're gonna invite me to sit at the Popular Table any day now, I just know it.

And my new fitness routine is going great.  I used to be able to do just one pushup.  But now, after months of intense training and merciless workouts, I’m finally able to do — TWO pushups!

My strength has doubled!  Olympics, here I come.



Blogger Lisa said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

July 10, 2012 at 10:43 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Now that Obama "owns" the Supreme Court , he can get back to his "beatdowns" on congress until he owns them too and can have his one man government.
To hell with a "Nation of Laws"

July 10, 2012 at 10:43 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

So they are as popular as herpes. Way to go congress, being the gift that keeps on giving.

July 10, 2012 at 11:24 AM  
Blogger Jerry Critter said...

They should pass a few more Democratic programs and become even more popular.

July 10, 2012 at 12:45 PM  
Anonymous Jolly Roger said...

Now that Obama "owns" the Supreme Court , he can get back to his "beatdowns" on congress until he owns them too and can have his one man government.
To hell with a "Nation of Laws"

This kind of stupidity is why God wants dumb broads like you to stay in the kitchen. You clearly, CLEARLY regurgitated this straight from AM radio, and if they decide that Roberts turned back into God tomorrow, you'll regurgitate THAT verbatim, too.

The truth is, dumb broads like you are just too silly to talk about brainy things like politicking. You need to go bake some cakes.

July 10, 2012 at 1:16 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

JR's approval rating,much like his attitude is sinking like the Titanic.

July 10, 2012 at 4:36 PM  
Blogger S.W. Anderson said...

Been down so long, it looks like up to Boehner and his merry band of saboteurs, hostage takers and obstructionists. If this keeps up, he might not need so much quality time with his sidekick, Johnny Walker. (Or maybe he prefers rum and Kochs this time of year.) :)

July 10, 2012 at 5:25 PM  
Blogger Mr. Charleston said...

Thanks for the laugh Tom. Enjoyed the Lisa and Roger show too. Congress' approval rating increased because SCOTUS upheld Obamacare. People feel sorry for them.

July 10, 2012 at 8:21 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: No, I think herpes is more popular.

Jerry: They don't need to. Now that they've actually passed two bills, only 4 out of 5 Americans hate them. They're basking in their new popularity.


SW: Yup, everything is relative. From 9% to 17% must be an incredible rush. But Boehner will always stick with his tried-and-true friends like Johnny Walker.

Mr. C: You're right, maybe people like Congress because they feel sorry for them.

July 11, 2012 at 10:22 AM  

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