Who Hijacked Our Country

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

I’ve Seen the Error of My Ways: We NEED Unions

by Scott Walker

My life has been so sheltered and privileged, I’ve simply never had the tiniest inkling of what it means to work for a living and why labor unions are so important for working people.

But after yesterday’s game between the Green Bay Packers and the Seattle Seahawks, the point was brought home to me.  It’s all so clear now.  Oh, what an utter despicable douchebag I’ve been.  We NEED labor unions.

And suddenly I understand this.  I never had anything against labor unions before; I just didn’t understand what they meant.  My corporate bosses told me to destroy them, so I did.

But now that I’ve suddenly grasped the situation, I realize how many hundreds of thousands of lives I’ve ruined with my disgraceful union-busting.  Not only the lives of workers who are no longer able to bargain collectively, thanks to me.  But also the quality of work we get when employees are underpaid, shat on by their employers and, most of all, when under-qualified scab referees are brought in to replace the referees who are on strike.

My team lost yesterday because of a bad call by a scab referee.  After a few hours of binge drinking, kicking the dog and slapping the wife and kids around, I got over it; and I started seeing the bigger picture.  It’s awful!  Hardworking people whose wages have been reduced.  By ME.

People who called the fire department, and a bunch of inept scabs responded.  They were late and they couldn’t put out the fire.  People whose children are taught by underpaid unqualified teachers because the best teachers have left the school system to find something more lucrative.

There are hundreds of examples like this.  And it’s eating me up.  I sincerely apologize for being a cocksucking son of a whore; just an errand boy — a prostitute! — for a few corporate conglomerates.

I can no longer live with myself.  I am humbly asking the public:  Is there any possible way I can redeem myself and turn my life around and be a useful citizen?  Or should I go get my gun and do the honorable thing?

Please be honest.

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Anonymous Jess said...

This always happens with repugs. When it affects them personally they go all in with (insert whatever here). Stem cell research is bad, it kills babies, until someone from my family could possibly be cured with the research from stem cells, so killing babies is now ok. He is being called as a witness by the way, in one of his minions trials that will start next month.

10 new voters registered today people. Not a lot but they are first time voters, so it all counts when they add up, pretty soon there will be hundreds.

September 25, 2012 at 2:55 PM  
Blogger jadedj said...

I loved this comment in that article:

"Liberal And Loving It • 4 hrs ago Report Abuse
Too bad the owners are not making enough money to pay the regular officials."

September 25, 2012 at 3:24 PM  
Blogger Mr. Charleston said...

LOL Are you sure this was Scott Walker and not Rick Scott?

September 25, 2012 at 5:26 PM  
Blogger Snave said...

What Jess said.

I know a couple of people who were anti-Affordable Health Care and who have had medical emergencies in the last year... now they are all for it. One of my relatives has been ill for a long time, and hates the Democrats in general and Obama in particular, and their family is living on government money now. A friend of mine is all for repealing Affordable Health Care but loves the part about being able to keep her 24-year-old son on the insurance.

That is indeed how it is with lots of right wingers about a lot of things... they are against it until they are for it, once they realize it provides a positive benefit to them. And in a society where "it's the economy, stupid" we aren't talking about just the national economy, we're talking about our personal pocketbooks.

Who doesn't like a law that is designed to keep people from having to die because they can't afford health care? Well... people who have never had any personal experience with that sort of thing, and who think "that will never happen to me". In other words, short-sighted people who think they are invincible (and who probably read NewsMax, listen to AM "talk radio" and watch FOX "News" on a regular basis).

September 25, 2012 at 7:14 PM  
Blogger Snave said...

Also, GREAT piece, Tom! 8-)

September 25, 2012 at 7:15 PM  
Blogger S.W. Anderson said...

If only. That's all I can say.

September 25, 2012 at 11:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


If the family of Icon Ronald Reagan couldn't convince them about stem cells - nobody can.

If they had stem cells back then, he could have done 8 more years after a break with Bush!



September 26, 2012 at 2:27 AM  
Blogger Jack Jodell said...

What a lying hypocrite Walker truly is!

September 26, 2012 at 10:02 AM  
Blogger Demeur said...

What's the expression? Never judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes. Looks like somebody slipped on some walking shoes.

September 26, 2012 at 11:11 AM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jess: These people are chickenhawks in every possible sense. As soon as an issue affects them personally, they do a big 180 -- "oh, wait, now that I think about it..."

jadedj: I liked that one too.

Mr. C: Those 2 have a lot in common.

Snave: Thanks.

Yup, that's the exact pattern every time. The ACA is "socialized medicine" until someone in their own family gets sick. It's like that cartoon where a teabagger says "Keep those government bureaucrats out of my Medicare."

SW: My sentiments exactly.

Erik: With stem cell research and other scientific breakthroughs, we could have had Reagan in the White House for decades, with a 4-year break every eight years.

Jack: He sure is.

Demeur: Unfortunately, Scott instructed his butler to put the walking shoes on and then tell Scott what it was like.

September 26, 2012 at 1:09 PM  

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