Sometimes It’s Perfectly Legal to be a Douchebag

And here to demonstrate this fact is the winner of our annual Inbred Knuckledragging Lowlife of the Year award. (If the link doesn't work, here are some others.)

This sounds like a sick comedy skit, except that it’s just sick — not funny — and it really did happen. You couldn’t possibly make this up.

Try to imagine this: you’re standing there frantically screaming for your dog to come back as he/she runs out in front of a car and gets hit. Killed. And the next thing you know, the driver is suing YOU because your dead dog damaged his car. WTF???

Jeffery Ely of Cloquet, MN is the winner of the above award. A Miniature Pinscher dashed in front of his car as he was driving by, at the posted speed limit. Accidents happen.

But Ely supposedly discovered some damage to his car afterward, and he filed a lawsuit against the dog’s owners. He said they owed him $1,100 for damage to the front end of his car and for the time he missed from work in order to deal with car repairs.

No doubt he was sorely missed at his place of employment. “Cleanup on Aisle Seven. Damnit, where the hell is that F$%&!# Ely?!?”

Oh, and the dog weighed thirteen pounds. A 13-pound dog caused over a thousand dollars worth of damage to a car? Asshole!

A judge has dismissed the lawsuit. But still…How low can somebody go?

A final sick/funny twist to this story: Jeffery Ely is now claiming that the publicity from this incident has ruined his reputation.

cross-posted at Bring It On!