Supreme Court to Big Business: “We’ve Got Your Back”

Give us your poor industrial polluters, your huddled corporate conglomerates yearning to breathe free…

The Supreme Court has struck two more blows for Freedom and Liberty. Hardworking Americans will no longer be oppressed by femi-nazis, class warriors or treehugging environmentalists.

Wal-Mart can keep on discriminating against women without any further whining from them women’s libbers or meddling government bureaucrats. And this time the Corporate Arm of the Republican Party ruled unanimously. There weren’t any token dissenters pretending to care about the riffraff.

In another unanimous ruling — might as well drop the pretenses and the crocodile tears — the Politburo ruled in favor of greenhouse gas emissions and against the ozone layer.

Several state governments and conservation groups had filed a federal lawsuit to force reductions in greenhouse gas emissions. The Court ruled that only the Environmental Protection Agency has the authority to reduce emissions. Well, that boxes the compass, since Congressional Republicans are determined to withhold the funding that would allow the EPA to do its job.

Now THAT’S teamwork.