Who Hijacked Our Country

Sunday, September 01, 2013

Entire NFL season CANCELED over Alcohol Concerns

There will be no NFL games this season, due to officials’ growing concerns over consumption of alcohol among football fans in the stadiums and parking lots.

Alcohol is a powerful drug which lowers a person’s inhibitions and curtails judgment.  This alcohol-induced uninhibited behavior leads to hundreds of thousands of assaults and accidents every year.  In addition, the health hazards of alcohol include — but are not limited to — heart disease, ulcers, pancreatitis, liver failure and certain types of cancer.

The official press release reads in part:

“NFL organizers have worked with city officials to reduce health risks at these games, but in view of these occurrences, the safest course is to cancel the rest of the season.”

And NFL officials said in a statement:

“Because there is nothing more important to us than our patrons, we have decided in consultation with local officials that there will be no games this year.”

6 Comments:

Blogger Jerry Critter said...

We should be so lucky!

September 1, 2013 at 6:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Football is American and builds Character. Millions of Fans consuming LEGAL alcohol (many of them families) not only adds to our economy, but supports quality time.

Need I say more?

Erik

September 2, 2013 at 3:04 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Damn and I thought this would free up my honey to go see the opera and shit. Not really, I had the same thoughts, who cancels a concert because 3 or 4 people die. Especially one where there are tens of thousands there. Hubby said it just culled the head of stupid people that don't know how to do anything in moderation. Next they will try banning Burning Man because the peeps there are dope smokers. The horror of it all is too much for me.

September 2, 2013 at 4:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I will hand it to the left you guys are good at avoiding the 'war' topic

September 3, 2013 at 7:32 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

@Anon, so what is your blog called, so we can go over there and see what you have written about it and bask in your righteousness? Yep, didn't think so.

September 3, 2013 at 4:19 PM  
Blogger Tom Harper said...

Jerry: Not a chance. Football and alcohol are sacred.

Erik: I have nothing against football (I don't follow it at all) or alcohol, which is pretty much the only drug I use. But people who attend concerts and purchase illegal drugs are also stimulating the economy. And the ongoing hysteria over "drugs!" is just too absurd.

Jess: Yup, Burning Man will be next on the chopping block. Dangerous drugs, lewd behavior -- it's un-American.

Anonymous: Just because I haven't done any posts about Syria doesn't mean I'm "avoiding the war topic." I'm against any U.S. involvement in Syria, like most Americans are. I'm assuming Congress will block Obama's request for authorization and the whole thing will become moot. Also, if there was a Republican in the White House, you'd be champing at the bit to attack Syria, and yelling "Surrender Monkey!" and "you hate America!" at everyone who disagreed with you. Right?

Jess: LOL. If Anonymous is who I think it is, you wouldn't want to see her blog.

September 3, 2013 at 4:58 PM  

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