Jim DeMint: the Quitter

What is it about rightwing politicians who can’t even finish the term they were elected to serve?  You betcha!

Senator Jim DeMint (R—Spanish Inquisition) will be leaving the Senate.  He still has four years remaining in his current term.  South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley will appoint a replacement senator until a special election can be held.

Jim DeMint will be leading the ultra-rightwing Heritage Foundation.  A high-ranking member of the Heritage Foundation once said publicly that only property owners should be allowed to vote, so that gives you an idea of their politics.  And in everybody’s favorite irony of ironies:  the Heritage Foundation originally came up with the idea of the individual health insurance mandate in the early 1990s.  It didn’t become synonymous with Soviet tanks rolling across America until President Obama adopted the idea.

Jim DeMint told Rush Limbaugh:

“I think the problem is, as conservatives, we have not taken enough control of our message and our ideas and communicated them directly to the American people.”

Hallelujah!  That’s EXACTLY the problem.  In their hearts, the American People WANT to ban all abortions, eliminate all government spending on that commie infrastructure, and  increase “defense” spending so we can invade even more countries more often.  This is what Americans truly WANT, but conservatives just haven’t been able to communicate this message clearly enough.

Say the word “Abortion,” Go to Prison

Out of all the split-personality Republicans who yell “Freedom!” while simultaneously trying to bring back the Salem Witch Trials,

Senator Jim DeMint (R—Cocksucker) might be the most schizoid of them all.

DeMint’s latest brilliant idea:  A law prohibiting women and their doctors from even discussing abortion over the Internet.  No doubt this is the biggest screaming priority for millions of Americans who have lost their jobs and their homes.

Needless to say, Jim DeMint’s proposal is NOT a separate bill that could be voted up or down.  It’s an amendment that DeMint is sneaking into a larger bill — HR 2112 — relating to agriculture, transportation and housing.  Asswipe.

You can call the U.S. Senate at 202-421-3121 and tell them to oppose Jim DeMint’s amendment (Amendment #768) to HR 2112.

Does the Fourteenth Amendment Protect the Unborn?

Don’t laugh. This Earth-shaking topic was actually discussed by several Republican presidential candidates at the APP Palmetto Freedom Forum in Columbia, South Carolina. Yup, we keep going further back in time and the bar keeps getting set lower and lower.

APP stands for American Principles Project. The author of this article, Maggie Gallagher, is the founder of the National Organization for Marriage. The panelists included professor Robert George (who’s also a member of the National Organization for Marriage), Senator Jim DeMint (R—Inbred) and Rep. Steve King (R—Ku Klux Klan).

GOP presidential candidates included: Mitt Romney, Ron Paul, Michele Bachmann and Herman Cain. They were asked if the Equal Protection clause of the Fourteenth Amendment applies to unborn human beings and, if so, does Congress have the constitutional authority to enforce this guarantee?

Michele Bachmann gave an unqualified “Yes!” (What’d you expect?)

Mitt Romney hedged and waffled. Damn it, I knew he wasn’t a true Biblehumper. He said he didn’t want a constitutional crisis, but he pledged to appoint justices who would interpret the Constitution “correctly.”

Ron Paul said it’s a “states’ rights” issue. The article doesn’t give Herman Cain’s response; only that he was “surprised” by the question.

And there’s still more good news from this article (if you’re a fetus-worshiper): Every GOP presidential candidate — with the exception of Rick Perry — has pledged to select a vice presidential running mate who supports life and marriage; i.e. fetuses are sacred and God Hates Fags.

Ready now — set your time machines. Twelfth century here we come!

Barack Obama — The Twerp Factor

That's the title of this article. Shallow pointless questions like this shouldn't matter, but unfortunately, in America they do.

Here's a link to the P.J. O'Rourke article that they're referring to.

I used to love P.J. O’Rourke’s articles in Rolling Stone; and before that he wrote for Lampoon Magazine. He’s entertaining even if he’s a rightwinger.

Like it or not, shit like this is important to American voters; whether it’s conscious or subliminal. Americans want their president to be tall, well built, firm and decisive — Dirty Harry in a suit. It’s OK to be smart, as long as you don’t talk like some sort of intellectual elitist who thinks too much.

The 2004 presidential election might be the only time in our history where the shorter candidate won. The 1988 election was a choice between two ectomorphs. We elected the taller ectomorph.

Somebody once wrote that when Michael Dukakis was in high school, he probably raised his hand to remind the teacher that she forgot to give a homework assignment over Christmas vacation.

O’Rourke obviously isn’t trying to give helpful hints to Obama; but everyone can learn from negative feedback. After allowing the health care debate to rage on and on and on for a year — and here’s hoping his upcoming speeches will be more effective — maybe Obama could learn from O’Rourke’s description:

“The secret to the Obama annoyance is snotty lecturing. His tone of voice sends us back to the worst place in college…At the lectern is a twerp of a grad student—the prototypical A student—insecure, overbearing, full of himself and contempt for his students.”

I’m not saying I agree with this, but this is how a lot of people perceive Obama. I don’t want him to pretend his IQ suddenly plummeted to room temperature and start talking like Jim DeMint or Sarah Palin. But I do wish he’d start being more direct, more firm, more “of the people” in his speeches.

He’s personable and very articulate, but he sounds too much like a college professor at a faculty meeting. And this does NOT resonate with the public. He’s nowhere near as bland as, say, Bill Bradley — whom Molly Ivins described as “all substance and no Elvis.” But he should come out swinging sometimes; put more oomph into his speaking style.

There’s a lot at stake in the next few months: Wall Street reform and other raging issues, the Congressional election campaigns coming up. We already have millions of Americans who think Obama is a Communist Muslim terrorist who was born in Kenya. We don’t need a few million more Americans thinking he’s a twerp.

Introducing: The Incredible Shrinking God

Some of these wackjob politicians are funnier than any standup comedian. Senator Jim DeMint (R-Dildo) told the Christian Broadcasting Network that “the bigger the government gets, the smaller God gets.”

Wow! It’s magic! Kids, don’t try this at home.

Here’s Jim DeMint up on stage, holding a great big bloated government in one hand and a little teeny weeny God in the other.

But wait. ***POOF*** Now he’s got a teensy shrunken government in one hand — tiny enough to be drowned in Grover Norquist’s bathtub — and a giant omnipotent angry God in his other hand.

Fun for the whole family.

DeMint also said the teabaggers have God on their side:

“I really think a lot of the motivation behind these Tea Party crowds is a spiritual component. I think it’s very akin to the Great Awakening before the American Revolution. A lot of our founders believed the American Revolution was won before we ever got into a fight with the British. It was a spiritual renewal.”

Hmmm…“the American Revolution was won before we ever got into a fight with the British…”

Too bad all those killed and maimed Revolutionary soldiers didn’t get the memo.

Senator Jim DeMint versus Senator Jim DeMint

As much of a contemptible lowlife as Jim DeMint (R-Ku Klux Klan) is, it gets even worse:

There are TWO of him. [forms index fingers into a cross]

[screams]

One of the Jim DeMints has placed a legislative hold on one of Obama’s D.C. Superior Court nominees, Marisa Demeo. Her nomination has been on hold since last March.

Marisa Demeo is a Latina and she’s openly gay. That’s two strikes. And that’s not all. She’s done a lot of legal advocacy work on behalf of Hispanic and gay/lesbian issues. Steeerike THREE!

And now, this is where the Other Jim DeMint surfaces. In 2005, Senator Jim DeMint said:

“One of my goals as a Senator is to confirm highly qualified judges by ensuring timely up-or-down votes for all nominees no matter who is President, no matter which party is in the majority. That is my commitment, and I have encouraged Senator Frist to consider all options, including the constitutional option, to end the undemocratic blockade of judicial nominees. Senators were elected to advise and consent, not to grandstand and obstruct.

“I would like to say something to my colleagues across the aisle. There is a reason George W. Bush was elected to serve as President of the United States. It is because the majority of Americans trusted him to nominate judges.”

Jim DeMint was last seen walking up to a movie theater ticket window — by himself — and ordering two tickets.

Still More Rightwing Talking Points

It’s not enough to keep fending off “Death Panels!” and “People Dying in the Emergency Room!” As soon as the media has been saturated with the Far Right’s current soundbites, new ones come oozing up. And each new Big Lie is even more absurd than the last.

There were two anti-health-reform letters to the editor in our local paper last week. They both used the same bizarre “reasoning,” which I haven’t seen before. We’ll see if this becomes a new talking point that gets recited to death.

Basically, there’s only X amount of “health care” out there — a fixed amount, like so many apples in a barrel, or so much water in a reservoir. Now, if millions of uninsured people suddenly get access to health care, there’ll be less of it for everybody. After all, if a bunch of new people come sauntering up to a huge table loaded with food, there’s less food for each person.

Personally, this seems so oversimplified, it’s like explaining advanced calculus in terms of “if Billy has three apples, and Andrea brings him two more apples…” Not only is this “logic” simple-minded beyond words — if there actually is any truth to it, it shows an incredibly cutthroat mentality. “If millions of people are suddenly able to have those life-saving medical procedures they need, I might have to pay more for my Botox injections and my next tummy tuck.”

And the “slippery slope” arguments keep getting more hilarious all the time. It’s so passé to compare ObamaCare to Socialism, Communism, Russia, Nazi Germany. That’s been done to death already. Let’s really dig deep. Deeper. Let’s compare Obama’s evil agenda to — Iran! The Hostage Crisis! The Axis of Evil! NOOO!!!!!

South Carolina’s Favorite Son-of-a-Bitch strikes again. Senator Jim DeMint actually said:

“And we’ve seen a lot of countries over the years collapse when they’ve gone down the road that we’re going down. Probably the most heart-wrenching experiences I’ve had over the last several days is when naturalized American citizens who have immigrated here from Germany, Iran and other countries, they come up to me and they say why are we doing what so many have fled from? Why don’t Americans see what we’re doing? And I’ve realized that these people who’ve lived under socialist type economies, and totalitarianism, they know where we’re headed if we don’t turn things around.”

Remember, this is the same shitwipe that bragged about “breaking” Obama by defeating health care reform. Can’t wait to hear what the Bastard out of Carolina will be spewing out next.