“The Republicans want you to die quickly if you get sick”

So what else is new? Bravo to Rep. Alan Grayson (D-FL) for telling it like it is; calling a spade a spade. He didn’t exactly tell us anything we didn’t already know, but it sure is fun watching the indignant — shocked! — reaction from the oligarchs and their inbred worshippers.

“If you get sick, America, the Republican health care plan is this: die quickly. That's right. The Republicans want you to die quickly if you get sick.”

Finally, a Democrat who speaks the truth, bluntly, without any sugar coating. I’m glad Obama is smooth-talking and non-confrontational, but somebody out there has to fight fire with fire.

Republicans have been spewing out their intelligence-insulting bullshit for months now. Unfortunately, after decades of education cuts, “intelligence-insulting” and “popular with the masses” are one and the same.

Republicans — at the instruction of their puppetmasters in the health insurance industry — spent the month of August inciting riots at town hall meetings. And we’ve spent months listening to their hysterical blubberings about “Death Panels!” “People dying in the ER waiting room!” “Obama is a fascist-communist-terrorist-socialist Muslim and he was born in Kenya!”

And now when they finally get a taste of their own medicine, they squeal like stuck pigs. Good!

Alan Grayson — come on, don’t hold back. Tell us how you really feel. It needs to be said.

Health Insurance Companies Exempt from Anti-Trust Laws

Did you know about this? I had no idea until I got an e-mail the other day.

The McCarran-Ferguson Act of 1945 exempts health insurance companies from the federal anti-trust legislation that applies to most other businesses. WTF???

This outdated law (if it was ever “in” date) might finally be corrected. Senator Patrick Leahy and Rep. John Conyers have introduced the Health Insurance Industry Antitrust Enforcement Act — S. 1681 and H.R. 3596 respectively — to break up the health insurance monopoly and force these companies to actually compete. What a concept.

Whether or not they ever have to compete with that commie government option, they’ll at least be competing with each other. For a change.

It’ll be fun to hear those “free enterprise” “market forces” Republicans shouting and squealing against a bill that promotes competition. And you know they will.

If you’re ready to break up the health insurance monopoly, tell your senators and your congressional representative. Enough is enough.

Pope: “Bring Europe Home to Jesus”

Jesus would be turning in His grave if He could see what’s happened to His beloved continent. Europe was once a paradise teeming with Godfearing Christians. But now it’s deteriorated into a hopeless den of iniquity, overrun with every sort of degenerate filth — atheists, Muslims, pagans, socialists, you name it.

And now, finally, Pope Benedict is speaking out. During a speech in Brno, Czech Republic, the Pope gave a stern lecture to a continent full of sinners:

“Man needs to be liberated from material oppressions, but more profoundly, he must be saved from the evils that afflict the spirit…As Europe listens to the story of Christianity, she hears her own. Her notions of justice, freedom and social responsibility, together with the
cultural and legal institutions established to preserve these ideas and hand them on to future generations, are shaped by her Christian inheritance.”

He also said Europe’s religious roots “supply the continent with the spiritual and moral sustenance that allows her to enter into meaningful dialogue with people from other cultures and religions…Maintain the spiritual patrimony inherited from your forebears ... guard it and make it answer to the needs of the present day.”

Amen.

Financial Product Safety Commission

Those poor Republicans. No matter how hysterical they get, no matter how much they shriek and shout (don’t those spewfucks ever get laryngitis?), there’s always something else to get their panties in a wad. There’s always another threat to The America They Grew Up In.

Republicans already have their hands full battling Socialized Medicine and that treehugging energy legislation that Obama is pushing. And now their latest hissy fit: the proposed Financial Product Safety Commission.

This article was written by Bob Sullivan, author of Gotcha Capitalism.

This will be the first new federal consumer protection agency since the 1930s. The Financial Product Safety Commission will take over some of the jobs that existing agencies have been neglecting. The FDIC, Federal Reserve, Comptroller of the Currency, Office of Thrift Supervision, Federal Trade Commission and National Credit Union Administration will all have some of their responsibility and authority transferred to this new agency.

Gail Hillebrand of Consumers Union said consumer protection has been split among all of those agencies, and each one has passed the buck to somebody else. “It's a reflection of the degree to which those folks haven't done the job. Consumer protection is too important to be the orphan in the regulatory system. It has been everybody's last priority.”

Barney Frank and Christopher Dodd will be introducing legislation in the House and Senate respectively. This agency will have the power to:

Review new contracts (e.g. credit card terms of service agreements) and demand that these contracts be clearly written;

Require banks to store and share information that would help consumers compare terms and conditions;

Issue subpoenas to examine bank records when a complaint is being investigated;

Allow state governments to enact even tougher consumer protection laws; and

Extract fines — anywhere from a thousand to a million dollars per day — against banks who violate these rules.

Works for me.

Needless to say, the banking industry and the U.S. Chamber of Commerce are drawing up their battle plans. They’ve instructed their prostitutes in Congress to bend over and gyrate like they’ve never gyrated before, and they’re preparing a ton of sleazy TV commercials.

Since the health insurance lobby has had so much success with their phony “grassroots” organizations, maybe the banking industry will try the same thing. Get ready for some more of those spontaneous demonstrations. Millions of everyday Americans will suddenly fly into a rage at the thought of “Socialized Banking!” “Keep those bumbling government bureaucrats out of MY bank account!”

Original Draft of Sarah Palin’s Hong Kong Speech

Nobody will say exactly how many speechwriters and proofreaders are employed by Sarah Palin’s staff. But here is a copy of Sarah’s first draft of her speech:

Ah jeez, here I am in Hong Kong, gosh, the other side of the world, talking to a group of international investors. Or for you people, that would be “intelnationar investols,” heeheeheehee.

This is just so great, this historic meeting of Main Street USA and the Far East. Sort of Joe Sixpack meets, uh, you know, Chow Fu, or whatever your version would be. All these gun-hating Democrats are saying I don’t have any foreign policy experience, but look where I am right now. So there. And I bet they’ve never even been to Japan. Er, China.

Thank God there aren’t any reporters here to misquote me. Those people drove me out of office by twisting everything I say. All they ever do is mock me and make fun of my sin tax.

Now, I heard you’re having ethnic problems with those Weegers or whatever you call them. I don’t want to tell you how to run your country, but in Alaska we like to shoot wolves from helicopters. Couldn’t you just fly a few helicopters over that place where those Weegers live and, you know, I’m just saying…

I know you like having a big centralized government that runs everything and meddles in everyone’s lives. That’s fine for you people, but now America has started doing the same thing, this big smothering government barging into everything and telling hardworking Americans what to do. Joe and Jane Sixpack are not happy about this. We have a president who was born in some filthy third world country even more primitive than this one, and he’s ruining America. I always tell people, why don’t you just move to Russia or China if you want some big giant godless nanny police state sapping your ambition. When Ronald Reagan was president, darn it that’s when America was her greatest. He took away that nanny state and made everyone free to pull their own bootstraps. And he knew in his heart that America was Number One and he didn’t care what the rest of the world thought of us, and he didn’t blink and cringe and run away every time some third world tinpot…

[Note to self, last paragraph still needs work]

Vietnam to America: “You Lost, Get Over It”

We trounced Japan in World War II, and several decades later they got even with us. Japanese cars and electronic equipment accomplished what Japanese bombs couldn’t.

In the early 1970s we got our asses kicked in Vietnam (might as well call a spade a spade), and now it’s payback time.

Multinational corporations are waging an aggressive multimillion dollar advertising binge to sell baby formula in Vietnam. Shades of the early 1980s when Nestle wreaked havoc all over the Third World, pushing their baby formula on impoverished families who couldn’t afford it.

The formula would be mixed with water, and since the local water supply was apt to be contaminated, a lot of babies died. There was a lot of global outcry at the time, but it was OK with American conservatives since those dead infants had already been born.

One of Nestle’s most famous advertising billboards showed a picture of a woman breastfeeding her baby, and a big red X was drawn through the picture.

Vietnam has strict laws promoting breastfeeding. The companies pushing their baby formula are either breaking these laws, or (more likely) they have lawyers who know exactly how close to the edge they can go and still be technically within the law.

These companies are paying doctors to promote their products, and these products are being pushed at health clinics. The baby formula industry spent more than $10 million on advertising last year, making it one of Vietnam’s top five advertisers.

Annelies Allain of the International Code Documentation Center said: “The companies have millions of dollars and dozens of lawyers, but the Vietnamese government has a tiny budget and just two people promoting breast-feeding.”

Yeong Joo Kean, an attorney with the same organization, said: “Just when you think you might have a watertight case, you'll get shot down on a technicality.”

Gee, why does the Third World have such deep resentment of the West?

Republican “Grassroots” “Populist” Anger

Believe it or not, the public’s unarticulated unfocused fury is actually being harnessed by Republicans. Republicans have spent eight years (or is that 28 years?) creating most of the problems that the public is angry and frustrated about. And now Republican leaders are actually channeling and using this mass fury for their own purposes. Go figure.

Maybe they’ve been inspired by the occasional news story about a firefighter who sets a fire and then charges in and rescues everybody so he can be a hero.

These two articles (here and here) both describe the Republicans’ recent success at manipulating a scared, confused and gullible public. It doesn’t seem to matter that Republicans don’t have any solutions of their own; not a single specific idea. Apparently it’s enough to just keep yelling “Obama Socialist Nazi Communist Fascist,” “government takeover of Your health care!” and “Death Panels!” and millions of gullible assholes will go “DUUUHHH, yeah that’s right.”

Personally I think it’s too early to make any predictions about the 2010 election. Until a few weeks ago, the “experts” were saying the Republican Party was shattered and they’d stay in the minority for a looong time. Now suddenly it’s “Obama is plummeting in the polls, Democrats will stay home and get stoned on Election Day since it isn’t a presidential election year, and Republicans will retake the House.”

One day at a time…

But it really is infuriating that the Democrats are just paralyzed by all this chaos and public anger, and the Republicans can just step in and start soothing and manipulating the masses. Sort of like an animal trainer who can calm a vicious snarling Rottweiler and then train him.

The newest issue of Rolling Stone has an article about this. The article isn’t available online. The website shows it on the table of contents — “The GOP’s Lie Machine” by Tim Dickinson.

If you’ve been reading liberal blogs and “alternate” news sites (Think Progress, Raw Story, AlterNet, etc.), this article won’t tell anything you don’t already know. But it’s encouraging to see a mainstream magazine like Rolling Stone publicizing this, since most of the mainstream “media” isn’t touching these issues.

The most revealing thing in the article is a quote from Dick Armey (former House Majority Leader; founder of FreedomWorks). Armey was asked why there wasn’t any of this populist fury over high taxes and “big government” when Bush was driving us trillions of dollars into debt. His response:

“We used to use the old saying in the West, that you got outta town just one step ahead of the hangman. That’s pretty much what happened with Bush. And poor old President Obama walked into town, y’know, just at high noon.”

Straight from the horse’s (ass’s) mouth.

And You Thought The Rightwads Couldn’t Get Any Dumber…

When it comes to putting two and two together, wingtards are incapable of making simple cognitive connections that a 5-year-old could make.

Take last Saturday’s Million Moron March (please!). (H/T to Bee for coining “Million Moron March.”)

While they were blubbering about being “Taxed Enough Already” and “Too Much Government,” thousands of them were riding Washington DC’s mass transit system around the city. No, they didn’t see the irony — are you kidding, you had to ask?!? — that this transit system was created by those inept faceless government bureaucrats that they hate, and it’s maintained by that socialist system of wealth redistribution (i.e. taxes).

But that’s not where the story ends. Ridership was twice what it usually is on Saturdays, because of all the afterbirthers and teabaggers clogging the city. And these pusbags were furious at the overcrowded trains and slow service, which was caused by their presence.

They want government to be shrunk down to the size of a bathtub, and at the same time, when they themselves need to catch a train, there had better be a timely uncrowded taxpayer-financed train ready for them right there on the spot, Right Now!

Fellow Teabagger Rep. Kevin Brady (R-TX) has actually written a letter to the Washington Metropolitan Transit Authority (WMATA), expressing his fury that these anti-tax bootstrapping teabaggers didn’t have more taxpayers’ money lavished on them.

DUUUHHH!!!

And that’s not all! In Florida (where else?!?), a “Christian” group has proposed an amendment to the state constitution which would ban birth control. (?!?!?!?!?)

Let’s see now, they’re against abortion; and yet prohibiting birth control would increase the number of abortions, so how in the —

Oh forget it…

“Grateful to Have a Job”

Ellen Goodman uses that expression in her September 10th column. When you Google that phrase you’ll get 3.7 million hits. Talk about a sign of the times.

Every time an employee gets downsized or outsourced, he/she leaves behind a coworker who’s carrying twice the workload — with no corresponding increase in pay or benefits. And the person’s supervisor is probably more stressed, more harried and even more of an asshole to work for.

As Ellen Goodman says:

“But there are, after all, just as many cases to be managed by fewer social workers. There are just as many floors to be cleaned by fewer janitors…The government doesn't track how many are doing the labor of their former co-workers. Nor does it quantify economic anxiety. The closest we get to numbering the grateful worker is in the figures showing that job-leavers — those who voluntarily quit — are at an all-time low. Trust me, they aren't all staying because they suddenly love their bosses.”

Economist Heather Boushey calls it the “gloves-off economy.” Employees are scared shitless of getting laid off or fired, with or without a valid reason. And they’ll do anything — anything! — to avoid any perception of giving less than 200%. Working long hours without putting in for overtime; coming to work even when they’re sick (or a loved one is sick) — OK, OK, I’ll do it! Don’t rock the boat! Don’t ask for anything or call attention to yourself in any way, and never never ever say no.

Goodman also says: “The talk of work-life balance has fallen as fast as a 401(k)…Indeed, if fear is more contagious than the swine flu, what's going to happen when workers choose between putting their health on the line or their jobs?”

In a related story: the National Labor Relations Board is still paralyzed after years of being sabotaged by Republicans. Believe it or not, this agency — as the name implies — at one time actually protected workers from unfair labor practices.

Dozens of disputes are still pending. The final decisions will have a huge effect on American workers for decades to come.

When a Republican president takes office, every agency that protects workers’ safety, education, consumers, the environment — instantly gets emptied out and stacked with Republicans who want to abolish the agency because they hate everything it stands for. But eight months after Obama has taken office, the National Labor Relations Board is still full of rightwing oligarchs who have nothing but contempt for anybody who works for a living.

The agency is still constipated with holdovers from the Dumbya administration; the fox guarding the henhouse, as it were. It’s time to deliver a massive dose of Ex-Lax and get that shit out of there.

Night of the Living Dead: The Sequel

Here are some exclusive preview photos of what promises to be the scariest science fiction movie Ever.

Here's the basic premise: An evil invisible monster has taken over the minds of America’s dumbest and most gullible citizens. These inbred mouthbreathers are just harmless couch potatoes most of the time. But when the sinister FreedomWorks Monster sends out its rays, these human spuds will turn off the TV, jump up from the couch and snap to attention — ready to carry out their Master’s orders.

One minute they’re sitting there with a beer in one hand and a bag of chips in the other; and the next minute they’re marching in lockstep with their fellow zombies.

They have no idea why they’re marching and carrying signs, or even what’s written on the sign or what it means. And it doesn’t matter. The FreedomWorks demon just needs a certain number of braindead bodies to march, wave signs and start screaming and shouting on command.

After these mindless drones have carried out their marching orders, they’ll go back home — still under hypnosis — turn the TV back on, and fall back on the couch. When they come to, they won’t remember a thing.

Pretty scary, huh? Thank God it’s only a wacky movie.

Rush Limbaugh: Six Degrees of Separation

Would you believe, there’s a connection between OxyContin “Rush” Limbaugh’s famous drug habit and last month’s orchestrated town hall “demonstrations.”

There’s a slippery behind-the-scenes organization that calls itself the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons. The “physicians” and “surgeons” in this group are probably in the same category as those elusive “veterans” in Swiftboat Veterans For Truth — i.e. non-existent.

When Rush Limbaugh was on his Quest for the Perfect Fix (aka “doctor shopping“), this group filed a suit to keep Limbaugh’s medical records private. Apparently they didn’t want their hero to be prosecuted for the same drug violations that he wants everybody else to be imprisoned for.

Currently this sleazebucket group is working with FreedomWorks to promote more of those spontaneous demonstrations against that commie in the White House. Rent-A-Drones posing as “concerned citizens,” mass-produced protest signs that are crudely drawn so they’ll look homemade — they’ve got it all.

It’s bad enough that this group of “doctors” is trying to derail any and all health insurance reforms. They’re also trying to move us backwards. Their current goal is to abolish Medicare — since those government bureaucrats can’t do anything right — and let private insurance companies reap the bounty. Yesss!!! Start the gouging!

Now this is the kind of enterprising ingenuity that made America what she is today. Whiny liberals would probably see this in terms of millions of dues-paying Americans who need a safety net. But if you’re a conservative — it’s a gold mine. A money train! Tens of millions of people who are too old and too vulnerable to fight back when you take everything they have (and then some) — There IS a god!

Cracking Down On Those Deadbeats Who Don’t Have Health Insurance

Finally! While liberals continue to blame capitalism for our health care crisis, a few senators have finally pinpointed the true culprit in this mess: People who don’t have health insurance. And they’re gonna nail those parasites with a huge crippling fine.

After these lollygaggers have learned their $4,000 lesson (with money they don’t have), they’ll march right down to the nearest insurance office and purchase a health insurance policy. Problem solved!

And why do we even have a health care “crisis” anyway? Real Americans don’t get sick. Or if they do, they grin and bear it, suck it up and go on about their business. Our ancestors would be turning in their graves if they could see the bunch of whimpering little pansies this country has turned into. “I have a crushing feeling in my chest.” “Uuuuggghhh, my kidney hurts.” “I can’t see!!!”

Jesus Fuckin’ Christ, get a grip! If you think you’re “sick,” either man up and tough it out — or buy yourself a health insurance policy so you won’t be a burden on productive Americans.

There are plenty of health insurance companies to choose from, and they’re here to help you.


Today’s Trivia Question: How many copywriters, proofreaders and grammar correctors did Sarah Palin use for her Wall Street Journal editorial?

“No More Mr. Nice Guy, Mr. President. We Need a Fighter.”

While Obama is talking to millions of students tomorrow, this is the speech that needs to be broadcast into the White House. And beamed in again and again — an endless loop.

This speech by Bill Moyers is about five minutes long. The video and written text are both at this link. (H/T to Port Book and News of Port Angeles, WA for having excerpts from this speech posted on their daily chalkboard.)

America is “the greatest show on earth. Forget what you learned in civics about the Founding Fathers — we're the children of Barnum and Bailey, our founding con men. Their freak show was the forerunner of today's talk radio...”

“So here we are, wallowing in our dysfunction. Governed — if you listen to the rabble rousers — by a black nationalist from Kenya smuggled into the United States to kill Sarah Palin's baby. And yes, I could almost buy their belief that Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction, only I think he shipped them to Washington, where they've been recycled as lobbyists and trained in the alchemy of money laundering, which turns an old-fashioned bribe into a First Amendment right…”

“Poor Obama. He came to town preaching the religion of nice. But every time he bows politely, the harder the Republicans kick him. No one's ever conquered Washington politics by constantly saying ‘pretty please’ to the guys trying to cut your throat…”

“This health care thing could have been the crossing of the Delaware, the turning point in the next American Revolution — the moment we put the mercenaries to rout, as General Washington did the Hessians at Trenton. We could have stamped our victory ‘Made in the USA.’ We could have said to the world, ‘Look what we did!’…”

“Come on, Mr. President. Show us America is more than a circus or a market. Remind us of our greatness as a democracy. When you speak to Congress next week, just come out and say it. We thought we heard you say during the campaign last year that you want a government run insurance plan alongside private insurance — mostly premium-based, with subsidies for low-and-moderate income people. Open to all individuals and employees who want to join and with everyone free to choose the doctors we want. We thought you said Uncle Sam would sign on as our tough, cost-minded negotiator standing up to the cartel of drug and insurance companies and Wall Street investors…”

“Josh Marshall…is the founder of the website talkingpointsmemo.com…He's
offered the simplest and most accurate description yet of a public insurance plan — one that essentially asks people: would you like the option — the voluntary option — of buying into Medicare before you're 65? Check it out, Mr. President…”

“This health care thing is make or break for your leadership, but for us, it's life and death. No more Mr. Nice Guy, Mr. President. We need a fighter.”

Help Wanted: Need Employees to Write Form Letters and Attend Protest Rallies

It’s bad enough we’ve been swamped with all this phony “grassroots” activism manufactured by corporations and rightwing think tanks. Now it turns out this Astroturf “activism” is part of your job description if you work for UnitedHealth or WellPoint.

Consumer Watchdog has urged California Attorney General Jerry Brown to investigate these two companies for violating state labor laws. Both of these companies have in-house advocacy groups: United for Health Reform, and Health Action Network. Company employees were “encouraged” to contact their advocacy group — during business hours — for help in crafting letters to Congress. One company e-mail said: “By working with an advocacy specialist to personalize your message, you can quickly and easily add your voice to this historic debate.”

Employees were also encouraged to attend demonstrations and town hall meetings.

A spokesperson for Consumer Watchdog said: “While coercive communications with employees may be legal, if abhorrent, in most states, California’s Labor Code appears to directly prohibit them.”

This has all been part of the huge lobbying effort by AHIP, who’s mobilized fifty thousand “activists” to sabotage the public option.

Throw the book at those motherfuckers.

Remember that quaint old Fairness Doctrine that Republicans have such contempt for? Well, now it seems they want it back.

Labor Day: Brought to You by Massey Energy and Verizon Wireless

What’s the most burning issue on your mind right now? If you’re like millions of everyday Americans, you too are just boiling with fury over those environmental extremists and that moonbat “clean energy” legislation that’s threatening America.

If a mining company needs to remove mountaintops in the process of meeting America’s energy needs, then By God those F#$%!&# treehuggers can just get the fuck out of the way. Tens of thousands of Americans feel so strongly about this — on Labor Day they’re going to pull themselves away from their family gatherings and barbecues, and they’re gonna go out there and demonstrate against those environmental wackos.

This public fury has been generated at the grassroots level, and these protests will be completely spontaneous. Well, almost.

They’re getting a little help from Massey Energy, Verizon Wireless and a rightwing anti-science front group calling itself the Science and Public Policy Institute.

This demonstration is called the Friends of America Rally. The purpose of course is to express the general public’s alarm and anger at the pending Waxman-Markey clean energy legislation. Speakers will include Sean Hannity and Ted Nugent.

I know Ted Nugent is somewhere to the right of Genghis Khan, but the one time I ever heard him speak, he was funny and likeable. It was a Politically Incorrect episode that also included Gloria Allred. I was sure those two would be punching each other out before the end of the episode, but they were both friendly and jovial, even while blurting out exactly what they thought (like everyone did on that show).

Verizon likes to pretend they’re a “green” company, but one of their vice presidents is on the board of directors of the ultra-rightwing National Association of Manufacturers.

If you'd like to tell Verizon to get out of bed with the Far Right douchebags of this country, you can do so here.

Washington Bigots Get Enough Signatures for November Ballot

The State of Washington doesn’t have gay marriage. But the state legislature recently expanded the benefits that gay couples are entitled to. The new law is nicknamed “Everything But Marriage.”

This was too much for the knuckle-dragging Biblehumping community. They immediately started a petition drive — known as Referendum 71 — to overturn these special privileges for homosexuals. Most people didn’t think the group would get enough signatures to qualify for a ballot initiative. Even the usual rightwing suspects weren’t too gung ho about this.

But the group has squeaked by with barely enough signatures. Even a liberal state like Washington has a certain percentage of neckdrooling witch-hunters. So the “Everything But Marriage” benefits will be postponed until after the November election when the Spanish Inquisition initiative (presumably) gets defeated.

The one silver lining here is the creation of the popular new online game — Whack-A-Redneck™.

By law, when you sign a petition to put an initiative on the ballot, your name and address become public information if/when the petition gets enough signatures to qualify. So the opponents of Referendum 71 have created this website — WhoSigned.org — sort of a statewide directory of Washington’s most retarded rednecks. Dial-A-Bigot.

The names aren’t there yet, but they should appear any day now. At the moment everything is on hold: There’s a lawsuit to have Referendum 71 blocked, or at least delayed.

And there’s another lawsuit to prevent the petition-signers’ names and addresses from being published online (even though it’s already public information). Some people think bigots have a right to remain hidden under their rocks while they try to take away other people’s rights.