Legislation to End Overuse of Antibiotics on Factory Farms

If you only sign one petition today, please sign this one.  Ask Congress to pass HR 1150, the Preservation of Antibiotics for Medical Treatment Act (PAMTA); and S 1256, the Preventing Antibiotic Resistance Act (PARA). 

It's a start anyway.  I realize this doesn't have a snowball's chance in Hell of ever passing.  Congressional prostitutes actually putting public health and safety above the profits of their Factory Farm owners?  You'd be more likely to hear the skankiest street-corner hooker saying to a john:  “Yuck!  You want me to do what???  No way!  I mean, I like you and all, but not in THAT way.”

But we can dream.  Did you know:  Eighty percent of all antibiotics in America are being used on farms.  No, they're not being used so a sick person can treat a raging bacterial infection.  They're being used on factory farms so that livestock animals will be less likely to get sick from their overcrowded filthy conditions.

And we wonder why there are more and more hardy bacterial strains that can tolerate every antibiotic you throw at them.  Roughly 23,000 Americans die every year from untreatable antibiotic-resistant infections.  But hey, factory farm profits are higher than ever.

Again, here's the petition.

“Climate Change” vs. “Global Warming”

Damned if we do, damned if we don't. The term “Climate Change” is more accurate, since the symptoms include hurricanes, floods and blizzards as well as hotter temperatures. But the general public is more alarmed and willing to act when they hear “Global Warming.”

“Climate Change” sounds too cerebral, too detached. “Global Warming” is more alarming, more galvanizing, but it opens the door for millions of inbred dunces to recite — on cue — “It snowed last night. So much for that there 'global warming' they keep talking about, huh huh huh uh uh uh.”

However, one particular group is extremely motivated by the term “Climate Change” — the Canadian government.  Stephen Harper's (no relation) administration is sooo alarmed by the term “Climate Change” that government meteorologists are not allowed to talk about it.  Period.  It's OK if a meteorologist mentions a specific weather event — a storm, flood, drought, etc.  But they are not allowed to say or imply that there's a larger pattern involved — i.e. “Climate Change” — or that fossil fuel consumption just might could maybe have something to do with it.

In fact, all government scientists are required to get permission from the federal government before they can speak to a reporter.  And they're told very clearly which answers they can and cannot give.

And for some odd reason, media coverage of climate change issues has decreased by eighty percent since Stephen Harper started muzzling Canadian scientists.  Andrew Nikiforuk, an award-winning journalists who's spent twenty years reporting on Canada's oil and gas industry, said:

“We have a government of thugs in Ottawa these days who are absolutely ruthless.  It’s a hostility and thuggery, is the way I would describe it. That’s exactly what it is.”

Anyone still think Canada is “better” or less corporate-owned than the U.S.?

Sarah Silverman: Fetuses are “Goo”

America's fetus-worshipers are having a mass seizure after Sarah Silverman referred to their favorite False Idol as goo.

A few months ago, Sarah Silverman had a YouTube video where she said Jesus Christ visited her and told her “Fertilized eggs aren't people. People are people.”

And last Friday, in an interview with Bill Maher, she gave fetus-humpers one more reason to pull their hair out.  She said she wants to show anti-abortion fanatics “a human face to this side that they only know as 'people who want to murder babies.' And meanwhile, it's goo. It's goo that they’re so worried about. And they're born, and it's 'you're on your own, slut.'”

Zing!

She also said:

“And the truth is, and I don’t like to admit this ... I’ve never had an abortion and I don’t know if I would. But it doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t fight to the death for women to make their own choices for their own human bodies.”

Bill Maher replied with:

“Thank you for being brave enough to admit you’ve never had an abortion.”

And then Fox News fell all over the interview with the headline:  “Sarah Silverman Is Embarrassed to Admit She Never Had an Abortion.”

[sigh]

As the saying goes, the joke isn't funny if you have to explain it.

“House Votes to Defund Reality”

I stole my post title from this article. Before I clicked on it, I assumed it would be a tongue-in-cheek, Onion kind of thing.  What was I thinking?  You can't possibly satirize rightwing corporate-funded Republicans.  If you try to make up some sort of zany humorous thing about them, they'll one up you every time.

According to the National Climate Assessment, recently released by the Obama Administration, the newest climate change data is so catastrophic that a “wartime effort” will be needed if we want to avoid Armageddon.

Upon receiving this dire warning, House Republicans flew into action.  You're probably thinking:  Oh good, the GOP finally got up off its knees, told the Koch and Exxon lobbyists to zip up their pants and get out and quit sabotaging the planet.

Nope.  House Republicans did what any good corporate prostitute would do.  They voted for an amendment to the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA) which would prevent the Pentagon from carrying out any of the policies recommended by the National Climate Assessment or any of them other commie U.N. organizations.  The amendment was introduced by Rep. David McKinley (R—Skank).  227 Republicans and four Democrats [sigh] voted in favor of this amendment.

As the linked article says:

“...the overwhelming support in the House [for the amendment] highlights the increasingly obvious gap between elected Republicans (and a few Democrats) and pretty much every government agency.”

For that matter, pretty much everybody who has two or three brain cells to rub together.

And in a related story:  the House Science, Space, and Technology Committee — led by Rep. Lamar Smith  — has spent more time investigating life on other planets than investigating climate change on this planet.

Fargo: Only Four More Episodes

I already wrote a post about Fargo (the FX miniseries) after the pilot episode, but I have to beat this dead horse one more time.  Last night's episode — the sixth out of ten — was just sooo good, I can't say enough about it.  At first I thought the miniseries might get too gimmicky.  Ten hours of Scandihoovian accents and caricatures of people who are so preoccupied with the weather forecast that they don't even notice when all Hell is breaking loose right in front of them?!

No such luck.  I'm usually reluctant to use superlatives, but at this point in the miniseries, I think Fargo is the best thing the Coen brothers have ever done — they're the executive producers of the series — and Billy Bob Thornton's most incredible acting/writing/directing performance ever.  I know that's saying a lot; that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

We've all seen a few actors who project a certain unsettling quiet intensity.  Billy Bob Thornton's character — Lorne Malvo — takes this to a whole new level.  The ice cold laser-focus intensity projected by Lorne Malvo is enough to make a TV viewer cringe.

Until last night, I thought the Fargo miniseries was good but nothing unique — just another action comedy featuring the Coen brothers' dark humor.  But last night's episode had it all:  intricate plot twists, unbearable white-knuckle suspense, gut-busting hilarity
— sometimes all at once.

I don't know how Fargo is doing in the ratings.  It doesn't matter anyway, since this is a one-time miniseries with no second season in the works.  If you're not already watching this show, do yourself a huge favor and check it out (Wednesdays on FX, 10 p.m.).

North Carolina Legislature Goes Down on Fracking Lobbyists

Currently, twenty states have laws requiring fracking companies to disclose which chemicals they're using.  North Carolina is not one of those states.  But it gets worse.

Some of North Carolina's skankiest energy industry prostitutes have introduced the Energy Modernization Act. What a nice name.  Who could be against something like that?

Under North Carolina's Energy Modernization Act, anyone who reveals which chemicals are being used for fracking operations is guilty of a felony.  This law, if passed, would also prohibit local communities from instituting their own stricter anti-fracking regulations, and it would limit the amount of water testing that can be done before a fracking operation is started.

The three Republican (of course!) legislators who introduced this bill are state senators Andrew Brock, Eldon Newton, and Bob Rucho.  This has to be the most blatant act of prostitution I've seen yet.  But the bar keeps getting raised (or lowered), and this record will soon be surpassed.

A reporter tried to talk with Andrew Brock, Eldon Newton, and Bob Rucho, but all three prostitutes were busy servicing their customers from the fracking industry and could not be reached.

Farmers Insurance to the Rescue

All right!  In addition to their entertaining TV ads — sing along now, bom pa dom bom bom bom bom — Farmers Insurance is cracking down on local governments that refuse to plan for climate change disasters.  You go guys!

They're obviously motivated by the bottom line and not altruism or any sort of warm and fuzzy feelings for Mother Earth.  But still, this is encouraging.  Just when you think every politician in the country is bought and paid for and owned and operated by the fossil fuel industry, another huge powerful industry steps in and provides a counterweight.

Farmers Insurance has filed nine class action suits against 200 local governments in the Chicago area.  The lawsuits are alleging that these localities have been negligent by not preparing sewers and stormwater drains for the additional rain that's been falling (and will continue to increase) because of climate change.  From the linked article:

“Farmers is asking to be reimbursed for the claims it paid to homeowners who sometimes saw geysers of sewage ruin basement walls, floors and furniture.  The company says it also paid policyholders for lost income, the cost of evacuations and other damages related to declining property values.”

An insurance expert speculated that Farmers “could be positioning itself to avoid future losses nationwide from claims linked to floods, sea-level rise and even lawsuits against its corporate policyholders that emit greenhouse gases.”

The director of the Center for Climate Change Law at Columbia Law School predicted that suits like this will become more common against local governments that refuse to prepare for climate change related disasters:

“No one is expected to plan for the 500-year storm, but if horrible events are happening with increasing frequency, that may shift the duties.”

Farmers Insurance is still the exception.  Out of 184 insurance companies surveyed, only 23 of them have a comprehensive strategy for dealing with climate change.  But these numbers should increase as more insurance companies realize they've been subsidizing the rightwing meme of “climate change is a hoax!”  According to the New York Times:

“Most insurers, including the reinsurance companies that bear much of the ultimate risk in the industry, have little time for the arguments heard in some right-wing circles that climate change isn’t happening, and are quite comfortable with the scientific consensus that burning fossil fuels is the main culprit of global warming.”

As the linked article says:

“The behemoth insurance industry could provide a counterbalance to the energy industry when it comes to incentivizing near-term emissions cuts, or at least adaptation to the effects of climate change.”

The Revolution WAS Televised. Nobody Showed Up.

Sorry, Gil Scott-Heron.  There were plenty of TV cameras; just no people.

Suppose they gave a massive tea party and nobody came.

Well, to be fair, a few people actually did show up for yesterday's Operation American Spring in Washington, D.C. It just wasn't quite the 30 million people they were expecting.   And they didn't accomplish their mission:  that Kenyan Muslim Conspirator is still in office.

The linked article has two photos of yesterday's sparse turnout.  Kinda sad.

Then again, these are the same geniuses that told us the War on Iraq would be a cakewalk, the war would be over in just a few weeks at the most, global oil prices would swoop to an all-time low, and grateful Iraqis would hail our soldiers as liberators and shower them with candy and flowers.

Yesterday's Operation American Spring actually did offer up a new Benhgazi explanation.  Or maybe it's not new; I haven't exactly been following the GOP's Benghazi orgy.

Wiley Drake, a pastor and talk radio host, has revealed:

“What caused Benghazi was a kidnapping gone awry.  Obama was going to kidnap Chris Stevens, and he got killed in the process. That’s what really happened, that’s the truth.”

I knew it! 

The Great Lime Shortage of 2014

Hell with droughts, floods, earthquakes caused by fracking — we're facing a lime shortage!  Drink prices going through the roof, or — even worse — Margaritas and Mojitos made with lemon juice!?!?!?!

Fortunately, a tiny parasitic wasp might be our Savior.  Limes in Florida, Texas and California are getting decimated by Huanglongbing, a citrus greening disease.   Huanglongbing is being spread by the Asian citrus psyllid, a tiny plant-eating insect.  And the Tamarixia radiate wasp kills these lime-eating psyllids.

The USDA will be spending $1.5 million on a breeding program to increase the numbers of these Tamarixia radiate wasps. The wasps will be released in Florida, Texas and California.  And believe it or not, Congress has appropriated $125 million to a fund for preventing Huanglongbing over the next five years.  You go Congress!

John Boehner may hate clean air, endangered species and poor people, but don't fuck with his Mojito.

President Obama's Last Day in the White House: Friday, May 16, 2014

This coming Friday, somewhere between ten and thirty million Patriots will take over Washington, D.C. and demand the removal of President Obama from office.  And the Muslim from Kenya isn't their only target.  Joe Biden, Harry Reid, and all those squishy compromising RINOs have to go too.  No prisoners will be taken!

Operation American Spring is planning to take America back and transform her into a Free Nation once again.  Retired Army Colonel Harry Riley, Teahadist-in-Chief of Operation American Spring, said:

“We are calling for the removal of Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Harry Reid, Mitch McConnell, John Boehner, Nancy Pelosi, and Eric Holder as a start toward constitutional restoration.  They have all abandoned the US Constitution, are unworthy to be retained in a position that calls for servant status.”

Whoever doesn't get removed from office by Operation American Spring will be pressured “to sponsor and pass very Constitutionally crafted State legislation to dissolve the size, powers, scope and spending of the U.S. Government by 2/3rds.”

Operation American Spring compares itself to the Arab Spring and Occupy Wall Street protests.

On the same day that 30 million Operation American Spring teajobs are occupying Washington DC, a sister event — also being staged by Operation American Spring, of course — will be held in  Bunkerville, Nevada to show support for Cliven Bundy and his gang of armed welfare chiselers.  They haven't said how many tens of millions of patriots will be attending the festivities in Bunkerville.

Operation American Spring held a similar mass protest in Washington DC about a month ago.  The megabazillions of protesters they were expecting turned out to be, uhh...not so many.  But Judson Phillips, founder of Tea Party Nation, praised the marchers for their courage and compared their event to the American Revolution:

“There is no way a militia with small arms can defeat the kind of arms the U.S. government can bring to bear on such a battle, but one has to admire the courage of those people who showed up to confront them.  That’s quintessentially American!”

Some of the teajadists are preparing themselves for the ultimate sacrifice this Friday, saying Obama might order drone strikes on the protesters.  Other members of the Teatard community have speculated that this whole thing is just a rumor, a false flag planted by the Obama Administration so that Barack Hussein Obama will finally have an excuse to launch a civil war and declare martial law.

I wish these Right-tards would make up their minds:  Is President Obama a weak-kneed pansy who apologizes while the world walks all over him?  Or is he a bloodthirsty dictator who will murder anyone who gets in his way?

How to Make Money from the California Drought

Or maybe this post should've been titled “Chinatown:  The Sequel.”

With California entering the third year of its worst drought ever, most Californians are leaving their cars unwashed, letting their lawns and gardens die, and hardly ever bathing or flushing the toilet.  (“Yellow is mellow, brown goes down.”)

The dried-up rivers and lakes have killed jillions of fish, and lots of farmers are either letting their crops die or plowing them under.  But that's just for chumps.  If you're shrewd, well-connected and have the conscience of a pimp, you can make a fortune from the California drought.  Froma Harrop describes the “Byzantine system of allocating water to a farming empire built where it shouldn’t be — in a desert...California has about 3,000 water districts, but the California Department of Water Resources doesn’t know the exact number. Nor does it have a clear idea what the districts are doing.  Out of complexity hidden in darkness rise corruption and reckless public spending. And fortunes are made.”

If you're growing the kind of crop that can be plowed under — alfalfa, strawberries, vegetables, etc. — then just plow it under already and wait for the drought to end.  But trees and vines take a long time to mature; they can't just be plowed under and then re-planted.  For somebody whose vineyards or orchards are mature and represent a huge investment, it might make sense to be allocated extra water during a drought.  Unfortunately the law doesn't make any distinction between someone whose orchard has been there for years, or generations even — and some sleazebucket who just this year started planting acres and acres of tree crops, just to take advantage of this loophole.

Another loophole (unique to California):  Residential developers are required to show that they have a source of water for the new residents they'll be bringing in.  Farmers have no such requirement; they can plant anything anywhere any time.  And this is where the vulture capitalists come in, and where the “Chinatown” reference comes from.

Quoting again from Froma Harrop's column:

“Billionaires Lynda and Stewart Resnick of Beverly Hills own Paramount Farms, an agricultural titan. Again, the water they obtain through public infrastructure may be used only for agriculture or restoring groundwater — according to law, anyway.  But that doesn’t seem to matter. The Resnicks appear to be selling some of their water to a developer seeking to create a new 2,000-acre planned community, Gateway Village, in another county. This is being done through a web of exotic arrangements — with the water bouncing through a maze of Resnick-owned companies, West Side Park Mutual Water Co. in particular...The Root Creek Water District, where Gateway is located, is in on the deal. Its lawyers will argue that the water being moved around is really just meant to recharge depleted groundwater. And that groundwater will be used for ... the pistachio and almond trees.”

Here are some more links to Lynda and Stewart Resnick.

The Ultra-Cool Hip New Heritage Foundation

When somebody mentions the Heritage Foundation, you probably picture a bunch of simple-minded dunderheads standing around wearing tri-corner hats and holding up misspelled signs – and the billionaires who are pulling their strings.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Somebody at the Heritage Foundation has finally figured out that a bunch of old white bigots preaching to each other is not the path to a larger audience.  So they've come up with an online news site, the Daily Signal, which they hope will reach out to America's women, young people, lower-income and minority groups.  Millions of these people have never had a chance to understand and appreciate the sleek elegance of the Invisible Hand of the Marketplace.

And when these same people – who have been brainwashed by the liberal media – look inward and examine their own beliefs and values, they'll realize:  They shouldn't vote.  More than that – they don't WANT to vote until they're pulling in a 6-figure salary and have bought some property; and the more expensive, the better.  It's simply not right – in fact it's immoral – for a productive property owner to have his vote canceled out by some swarthy low-income renter who contributes absolutely NOTHING to this great nation.

When the Heritage Foundation succeeds in tapping into the psyches of these previously brainwashed youth, minorities and womenfolk, there will be millions of new converts to the Conservative Cause.

Once again, it's cool to be conservative.  Racism rocks, Man.

Believe it or Not: Yet ANOTHER Legal Challenge to Obamacare

[sigh]

Either these assholes have absolutely nothing else to do, and/or their mission in life is to pull the rug out from under eight million Americans who have health insurance for the first time in their lives.

This time, the lawsuit isn't about the individual mandate or the Constitutional right of insurance companies to cancel your coverage while you're in the hospital, etc.  This lawsuit is based on some sort of technicality about a Senate procedure during the passage of the Affordable Care Act.  It was raining and Ted Cruz was blowing somebody in a red shirt, or something.

The lawsuit is being waged by the Pacific Legal Foundation. The linked article doesn't mention it, but the Pacific Legal Foundation is one of the Koch Brothers' front groups; one of hundreds.  When I lived in northern California (I hadn't even heard of the Koch Brothers back then), it seemed like every time there was a clash between a jillionaire developer and a local environmental/wildlife ordinance, the same shadowy group called the Pacific Legal Foundation would crawl out from under its rock and provide free legal counsel to the developer.  Food stamps for billionaires.  Goliath hitting David with a slingshot.

This lawsuit du jour is based on the Constitution's Origination Clause:

“All bills for raising revenue shall originate in the House of Representatives.”

The Pacific Legal Foundation argues that since the Supreme Court upheld Obamacare as a “permissible use of Congress' taxing power,” the Affordable Care Act therefore IS a bill for raising revenue.  And that's the crux of this lawsuit.

Harry Reid pulled some fancy Parliamentary maneuvers to get the bill passed (gee, I'm glad Republicans never do anything like that).  I'll hurt my head if I try to paraphrase this, so here's a direct quote from the article:

“Harry Reid used the Service Members Home Ownership Tax Act of 2009 as a template for the maneuver. That law, HR 3590, offered tax credits to military members who were first-time homebuyers.  Reid eliminated the entire text of the six-page law and replaced it with the 2,000-plus page bill that became the Affordable Care Act. All that remained of the Home Ownership Tax Act was the bill number, HR 3590.  After winning Senate approval, the 'amended' HR 3590 was sent to the House where the Democratic majority approved it. The bill was then sent to President Obama who signed it into law in March 2010.”

Therefore, the Affordable Care Act DID originate in the House.  Or did it?  And is the Affordable Care Act a bill for raising revenue?  We'll see.

The Obama Administration's response to the suit was:  “The Supreme Court has never invalidated an Act of Congress on the basis of the Origination Clause, and this suit presents no reason to break new ground.” 

Disabled Veterans' Healing Program, Anasazi Archaeological Treasures both Threatened by Illegal ATV Rally

Also known as Cliven Bundy:  The Sequel.

Recapture Canyon in southeastern Utah is the location of a 1,000-year old Anasazi pueblo.  Edward Abbey immortalized this area several decades ago.  The land is federally protected.

Recapture Canyon was the planned location for an extensive healing program for disabled veterans.  This program, planned long in advance, was to be co-sponsored by the BLM and the Sierra Club, and would have included Native American Medicine Men and Navajo war veterans assisting in the healing.  This event had been planned for this Thursday, May 8th.

But thanks to the above-mentioned Inbreds on ATVs, this veterans' healing ceremony has been canceled.  May 8th just happens to be the date that these ATV neckdroolers will be holding a protest rally in Recapture Canyon.  This illegal ATV rally is being led by a county commissioner in San Juan County, Utah.  This used to be called Inciting A Riot.  Why isn't that asshole in jail?  (The linked article doesn't give his name.)

The local mouthbreathers want a public 14-mile-long road built in Recapture Canyon, and this Thursday's ATV rally is supposed to draw attention to their struggle against that there commie federal gummint.

The linked article says:

“As for San Juan County’s claims over the land: They have no special rights. Public, BLM lands belong to you and your children, to fishermen in Florida or anyone in New York or San Francisco as much as they belong to residents of Blanding, Utah.  We white settlers in the West often conveniently forget that we were not the first to own the land; we merely got it from others who stole it from people who never claimed to own it in the beginning...We don’t need to see our public lands as a giant free super-market, a cheap place to graze our cows, extract minerals, drill for oil, grow a tourist economy or guide commercial trips.”

It would certainly be a shame if a few of those ATVs flipped over during Thursday's rally.  But it would be a huge benefit to the gene pool.

Kátia Abreu: Brazil's Version of Sarah Palin

Even worse, actually.  If Sarah Palin fucked Monsanto (corporations are people, after all), their hideous love child would be Kátia Abreu. She's a former senator and currently the head of Brazil's all-powerful agricultural lobby.  And she's determined to be Brazil's president someday.  If that ever happens, God help the planet.

When Kátia Abreu was a senator, she played a huge role in weakening laws that protected the environment and the rights of indigenous peoples.  More logging, more roads blazing through the rain forest, more genetically modified seeds for increased crop production – thank you Kátia Abreu.

About her intention of becoming president, Kátia Abreu says:

“Running for president is not a plan – it is fate. I’m getting ready for that, preparing in case it is my destiny.  Criticism from radical environmentalists is the best form of endorsement. It gives me satisfaction. It shows I am on the right track and playing the right role.”

Like so many American rightwing demagogues, Kátia Abreu incorporates flag-waving nationalism into her political message.  (How do you say “Why do you hate Brazil?” in Portuguese?)  Also – like her Far Right counterparts in the U.S. – she wages personal attacks against everyone who disagrees with her.  Environmentalists, indigenous groups and landless peasants are all “working for foreign interests.”

[sigh]

When Kátia Abreu runs for higher office, let's hope Brazilian voters are smarter than their American counterparts.

Obama Should Continue with His “Non-Existent” Foreign Policy

Last week Cal Thomas regurgitated the Far Right's favorite talking points about President Obama's “non-existent” foreign policy. Basically, Cal Thomas wishes Jack Bauer were still president; still vanquishing all our enemies single-handedly.  [sssshhhh — don't break the news to him and spoil the fun]

My favorite quote from his column is:  “Putin calculated he could get away with meddling in Ukraine because he perceived weakness in the president of the United States.”

Damn right!  Jack Bauer would have just marched right up to that Putin punk and coldcocked him!

Froma Harrop makes a lot more sense in her column from yesterday — Americans Tire of Solving Everyone's Problems.  Most Americans — not counting the Fox-suckers and talk radio dimbulbs — want the U.S. government to play a smaller role in global affairs.  She says:

“Our roads are shabby, the rail system Third World. We’re told America can’t afford the social niceties that nations we defend take for granted.”

Ukraine, South Korea/North Korea/China/Japan, Israel vs. the Palestinians, and Afghanistan are the main global powder kegs where chickenhawks are clamoring for Obama to “do something!”  Fortunately, most Americans want our government to “do something!” here in the States; not overseas.

And here is my favorite description of the manufactured hysteria over Benghazi:

“...a tragedy in search of a scandal. Not able to find a scandal or a smoking gun...Republicans have created one. They've bought the guns, fired them, noticed the smoke, and then yelled, 'Smoke!' And lo, with the announcement that Speaker John Boehner plans to appoint a 'select committee' to probe Benghazi, an entire arsenal of arms is being set up and ready to fire.”

Alliance Defending Freedom

The Alliance Defending Freedom wants to bring America back to the good old days of the third century.  That's not an exaggeration.  According to the group's website, the Alliance Defending Freedom “seeks to recover the robust Christendomic theology of the 3rd, 4th, and 5th centuries.  This is catholic, universal orthodoxy and it is desperately crucial for cultural renewal.  Christians must strive to build glorious cultural cathedrals, rather than shanty tin sheds.”

Don't laugh.  This may sound like just another band of retarded snake-handling Biblehumpers, or something out of The Onion.  Unfortunately, the Alliance Defending Freedom is well funded and has an army of lawyers — a “legal ministry” as they call it.  They've been litigating frantically behind the scenes, trying to overturn the Affordable Care Act's mandatory coverage for contraception and fighting for the God-given right of Christians to discriminate against gays and everybody else they hate.

The Alliance Defending Freedom was one of the driving forces behind Arizona's law — vetoed by Governor Jan Brewer — that would have allowed discrimination against gays, if this discrimination was based on “sincerely held” religious beliefs.  As you've probably guessed, the Alliance Defending Freedom is tax-exempt.  So much for the IRS' big “crackdown” on those Teabag/Biblehumping organizations that use YOUR tax dollars to pay for their political activism.

The Alliance Defending Freedom has spent more than twenty years fighting to ban abortion and homosexuality, and trying to quell that vicious rumor about some sort of separation between church and state.  They also were one of the litigators in the Supreme Court's infamous Citizens United vs. FEC case.  Yes, I remember that stirring Biblical passage where Jesus preached about the sacred rights of millionaires to purchase elections.

This group has also litigated for the right of St. Patrick's Day parade organizers to keep them icky LGBT groups out of the parade, and for Terri Schiavo's right to stay propped up on her feeding tube 'til she dies of old age.

The Alliance Defending Freedom was formed in January 1994 when several Christian activist groups merged.  The purpose of this new organization was to “press the case for religious liberty issues in the nation’s courts” and “fend-off growing efforts by groups such as the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), which seek to immobilize Christians.” 

Here's just one example of how “Christian” the Alliance Defending Freedom really is.  When this group was being founded, one of the ministers they invited to join them was John W. Whitehead.  His response to their invitation was:

“I told him I thought it was a vehicle to raise money.  I believe if you’re gonna be in this area, if you’re defending poor people, you shouldn’t be making money off it. Jesus was an itinerant preacher who was homeless. The guy that kept the money [Judas] turned out to be a government informant.” 

John W. Whitehead was blackballed by the Good Christians of the Alliance Defending Freedom.