Marijuana Being Sold From Vending Machines!

Yes of course it’s in California. And just to push even more conservative buttons — the owner (of the vending machines and the property) is a swarthy Middle Easterner. Dear God!

Just think of the millions of rightwing hands being wrung and teeth being gnashed when this story hit the news sites. While he's at it, the owner might as well install an abortion clinic and a gay bar on the premises. With millions of wingnut voters undergoing a simultaneous seizure, and an election next November…

Vincent Mehdizadeh, inventor and owner of the machine, described his service as: “Convenient access, lower prices, safety, anonymity.”

If you have a card authorizing the use of medical marijuana (and you're registered in Mehdizadeh’s computer database), you have 24-hour access to these pot-dispensing machines. There are three of these dispensaries; two of them are on property owned by Mehdizadeh.

These dispensaries are completely unobtrusive and they're surrounded by strip malls, car dealers, furniture shops, etc. The premises are nearly empty except for a security guard, some shelves stocked with herbs and vitamins and a contraption that looks like a large refrigerator (that’s the pot machine). The device is officially known as a Prescription Vending Machine (PVM). You provide your fingerprints and your pre-paid card, and the machine dispenses a bright green envelope. Guess what's inside!

Since the War on Drugs is one of America’s top priorities (your tax dollars at work), the Spanish Inquisition DEA is already zeroing in on this screaming emergency. A few months ago they developed a new improved, more jugular-based tactic: going after the owners of the property where medical marijuana is dispensed, and confiscating the property. If our government went after real problems with one tenth this much ferocity, this would be a much nicer country to live in.

A DEA spokesman said: “Somebody owns it, it's on a property and somebody fills it. Once we find out where it's at, we'll look into it…”

Well, that takes care of that urgent problem.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

What's-His-Face’s Final (God Willing) State of the Union Speech

OK, the spoiled pampered scion of the Bush Crime Family squirmed and squinted through his final (IF there’s a god) State of the Union Speech. We've heard it all before — the soundbites about “socialized medicine,” the gory things those swarthy primitive turrists will do to us if we don’t allow a few trillion-dollar telecom companies to be above the law, etc.

The counterpoint speech by Kathleen Sebelius wasn’t riveting, but she made some excellent points. I lost count of how many times she said “let’s get to work” and “join us Mr. President,” but if you’ve gotta use soundbites, those are good ones.

She seems to be following Obama’s tactic (George Will calls it “Obama-ism”) of using unifying phrases (“I’m here as an American, not as a Democrat”) instead of “us against them” and “those #$%&!#$#%&$#$!!!”

And that’s a good thing. For twenty years, every election has been nothing but name-calling and slandering, starting with the late-and-unlamented Lee Willie Horton Atwater during GHW Bush’s 1988 campaign. And the shitslinging has gotten worse with each successive election. As long as a politician is gonna give us platitudes, these platitudes might as well be unifying and all-encompassing instead of “those dirty #$%&!”

John F. Kennedy, Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton all based their campaigns on positive upbeat rhetoric. It worked for them. I haven’t exactly been glued to the primaries and all the election pandering (booorrrring!!!!) but it seems like Obama is the only candidate who's risen above the “if my opponent wins, we’re fucked!” rhetoric.

Let’s hope the positive messages of Barack Obama and Kathleen Sebelius will bring some positive changes to America so we can get rid of those motherfuckin’ shiteating — er, uhh…[Positive! Upbeat!]…let me rephrase that…

Does This “Science” Serve Any Purpose?

I’m not religious (as you'd probably guess from some of my other posts) but I still found this article sort of irritating.

The gist seems to be that people who believe in God — or anything supernatural — or who anthropomorphize their pets, well, they're basically just a bunch of introverted geeks who don’t have a life. “Loneliness Breeds Belief in Supernatural” is the name of the article. WTF?

It would be one thing if the above categories were just a small minority. But when you add up everybody who believes in a conventional religion, everybody who believes in some sort of afterlife or reincarnation (whether through religious or occult/metaphysical beliefs) and everybody who anthropomorphizes their pets — you're probably talking about 99% of the population.

So apparently one percent of the population is successful and well-adjusted, and the other 99% are just a bunch of neurotics who can't get it together.

I have no idea what the point of this article was. Even if it’s true, it’s like saying anybody who can't bench press 500 pounds is a wuss, or if you don’t work at least 19 hours a day you're just a waste of oxygen.

IMHO

cross-posted at Bring It On!

The Sun Never Sets on the American Empire

The February 2008 issue of American Legion Magazine has an article entitled “Over There: Where In The Word We Are” by Alan W. Dowd. The article isn't available online yet. The author has a website here. His earlier articles are accessible but not this current one.

The United States has nearly half a million troops stationed in 144 countries. We have the obvious ones — 168,000 troops in Iraq, 27,114 in South Korea and 24,800 in Afghanistan. The article doesn’t list all 144 countries but here are a few of the others:

We have a logistics unit in Singapore that enables U.S. Navy vessels to perform exercises. We have 240 Navy and Air Force personnel in Diego Garcia (yes it’s a place, not a person). We've got fifty thousand troops in Japan; just 711 in Australia.

In addition to Iraq we have troops in Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Qatar, Bahrain and the United Arab Emirates.

And we’re all over Europe with 58,000 troops in Germany and over ten thousand in the U.K. and Italy. We have a somewhat smaller presence in Spain, Portugal, Belgium, Holland, Kosovo/Serbia and Bosnia-Herzegovina. Oh, and Turkey, Romania, Greece and Bulgaria. And Greenland.

We also have a strong presence in Latin America and Africa (mostly Djibouti).

How crucial is all of this? What terrible things would happen if we pulled some (or even all) of our troops out of Portugal? Or Germany? Or Singapore, Djibouti, Greenland, Colombia, Diego Garcia…

Our entire infrastructure is crumbling, we’re hundreds of billions of dollars in debt, and we have American troops stationed in 144 countries. Is this right?

cross-posted at Bring It On!

Do You Send Personal E-mails From Work? You're Fired!

Several weeks ago, the National Labor Relations Board ruled that employers could prohibit members of labor unions from using the company e-mail system for anything union-related.

This story barely made a blip on the news radar, since most people aren’t members of a labor union or planning to join one. This ruling only applies to those blue-collar shlubs who work with their hands. Who cares about them?

But now — uh oh! It seems this NLRB ruling might be expanded; it could be used against ALL employees. Some legal experts are saying that if an employer forbids use of company e-mail for labor unions, they’ll also have to forbid ALL non-work-related e-mails on company computers. You know, discrimination laws and all that. And now tens of millions of office workers are simultaneously thinking “Oh my God, this affects ME!”

Or to paraphrase that famous German quote: “When they came for the janitors I did nothing because I have a desk and a fancy job title…then when they came for me…”

As the name indicates, the National Labor Relations Board at one time actually defended workers against unfair labor practices. But that was then. Like every other agency in the Bush Administration, the NLRB is now stacked from top to bottom with incompetent cronies who hate everything the agency stands for.

In the same way that FEMA “helps” people whose homes have been devastated by a hurricane, the National Labor Relations Board “defends” workers who are being trampled by a powercrazed boss.

Andy Stern, president of the Service Employees International Union, said:

“The Bush labor board has consistently demonstrated hostility toward workers who want to unite for a voice in the workplace, so this latest brand of discrimination unfortunately comes as no surprise. We need a labor board that truly has an interest in the needs of working people, not one eager to assist those corporate interests bent on trying to intimidate or censor workers who want to form a union to improve their jobs and the services they provide. This ruling is another sad example of how the deck is stacked against workers in America.”

Some managers are using the tired argument that since they own the computer equipment, they can restrict how it’s used. Riiight. They also own the bathrooms, the cafeteria and vending machines and all of the chairs and desks. Oh, and the parking lot. They could have a field day.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

Canadian Government Warns Its Citizens

Canadian citizens who plan on traveling outside of Canada have received a dire warning from their government. Canadian diplomats have been given a list of primitive barbaric countries that practice torture, and they’ve been duly warned that if they get arrested for any reason in one of these countries, they could be tortured. These backward third world countries include:

Afghanistan, China, Egypt, Israel, Iran, the United States of America, Saudi Arabia, Syria and Mexico.

And in one of these countries — I forget which one — the authorities won't even admit that they torture prisoners. There's a popular radio host who actually insists that these torture methods are “nothing more than a fraternity prank.”

Even more pathetic is the fact that millions of clueless Neanderthals actually believe everything this asshole says.

How dumb can people get? Whichever country that is, their education system must be pitiful.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

More Bush Assaults on the Environment

George W. Bush is already known for having more contempt for the environment than any previous president. He makes Ronald Reagan look like a starry-eyed hippie gazing at a redwood forest. It’s probably redundant to even talk about his latest assaults on wildlife. It’s like saying David Duke is a racist, or Grover Norquist hates people who work for a living.

But every time you think Bush couldn’t possibly do anything else to the environment — couldn’t possibly become any more of a douchebag — he does.

Bush has singlehandedly overturned a federal court ruling. I didn’t know he was a judge. Did you? A federal court had ruled that the U.S. Navy has to follow certain precautions so that their high-power sonar equipment doesn’t damage marine life. Bush said Nuh Uh.

We’re fighting a War on Tur; we don’t have time to get all touchy-feely about whales and porpoises. An al Qaeda submarine might sneak past the U.S. Navy and stage another 9/11 attack. Uh, that word again was: 9/11.

Also, Bush’s Interior Department has abandoned efforts to save the few remaining Jaguars in southern New Mexico and Arizona. If any of these areas near the U.S.-Mexican border were designated as critical habitat for Jaguars, it might jeopardize our brand spankin’ new border fence. And we need that border fence. We've got hordes of dark-skinned savages pouring into our country from Mexico and you're getting all maudlin over a few Jaguars?

We have 367 more days of this asshole stenching up the White House. (Or if you're in the military, that’s 366 and a wakeup.) Whoever takes his place has to be an improvement.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

You're Getting Mugged by American Corporations

If it seems like all of those hidden fees and surcharges are nickel-and-diming you to death — they are. Every time you turn around it’s $5 for this banking transaction, $10 added to your phone and cable bills for God knows what.

These hidden fees cost Americans $45 billion dollars a year. That’s roughly the same as the amount lost to Identity Theft each year. Unlike ID theft, these hidden fees are perfectly legal. After all, our legislators and regulatory agencies are fully owned and operated by the industries they're supposedly “regulating.”

This $45 billion doesn’t include penalties or late fees; these are simply the hidden charges you automatically pay every time you purchase a product or use a service. These hidden fees cost the average American almost a thousand dollars a year. Ah heck, you weren’t planning to use that thousand for anything, were you?

These hidden surcharges also don't include anything "extra" like vacations. This article is only based on the mundane everyday things you do: making phone calls, going to the bank, watching TV, using the Internet, saving for your retirement, buying groceries, etc. If you're some sort of spendthrift who likes to take fancy vacations, you might be paying closer to $4,000 a year in hidden fees.

The author of this article says: “Sneaky fees peck away at us like a swarm of mosquitoes that ruin an otherwise beautiful summer evening. And like mosquitoes, an individual bite might seem trivial, barely more than a nuisance, but repeated bites can actually change the way you live. They chase you inside, make you build a screened porch, and in extreme cases make you sick.”

He uses the term “Gotcha Capitalism.” “Gotchas are everywhere you turn, now. They are a way of life for consumers. They are our economic system, one that has replaced our former system, the free market economy. Gotcha Capitalism — your personal finances, under siege. Mosquitoes might threaten your life with death by 1,000 bites; Gotcha Capitalism threatens your finances with death by a thousand fees.”

cross-posted at Bring It On!

Be a Real Man — Buy a Ford

The Detroit Dinosaurs are depending on YOUR patriotism for their survival. You're their only hope; their shoddy gasguzzling land yachts certainly aren't gonna put them in the black.

Check out this heartwarming story. Look at Toby Keith standing there saluting next to a Ford F-150. Aren't you moved?

Real American He-Men are sick and tired of these limpwristed treehuggers and their constant “waaaaaaaaahhh global warming.” Just look at what these pansies have done to America.

Would John Wayne be caught dead in one of those squeaky little Japanese contraptions that goes wingdingdingdingdingding and gets fifty miles to the gallon? Hell No Pilgrim! And you won't either if you have any pride in this great nation of ours.

Detroit automakers have spent hundreds of millions of dollars defeating clean air regulations and fuel efficiency standards. And NOW they're supposed to turn around and spend even more money trying to design a car that somebody might actually want to buy??? That’s not faaaaiirr.

Toby Keith, bull rider Justin McBride and NASCAR driver Rick Crawford are urging you to buy a Ford. And there's a posse of bull-whipping cowboys urging you to buy a Dodge Ram. Come on Patriots. America needs you.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

Pakistan Has Weapons of Mass Destruction!

Those swarthy bastards have something to hide, I just know it. I thought Pakistan was our friend. Apparently not. Maybe Israel is our only friend. Well that's just FINE! It’s us two against the world. We can take ‘em!

Those backstabbing Pakistanis won't let us into their country to look for Osama bin Laden?!? The neverending search for Osama is the lynchpin of our Plan for World Domination Global War on Terror. We don’t want to find him, of course (is he even still alive?). We just need to keep pointing to him, keep the population riled up, and keep pretending we’re still looking for him.

This famous lesson from Hermann Goering has been our inspiration for the past seven years:

“Naturally the common people don't want war: Neither in Russia, nor in England, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But, after all, IT IS THE LEADERS of the country who determine the policy and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is TELL THEM THEY ARE BEING ATTACKED, and denounce the peacemakers for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. IT WORKS THE SAME IN ANY COUNTRY.”

And Boy Howdy does it work! Yeehaw! Whenever anybody questions why we’re occupying so many countries and bankrupting our own government, we have our Talking Points at the ready. “9/11.” “Soft on Terrorism!” “Surrender Monkey!” “Why do you hate your own country?”

Works every time. Those liberals are scared shitless to say anything. They know we’ll bombard them with names and innuendos, and they can't seem to think of any comebacks. So they just cower silently. Teeheeheeheehee.

But the cornerstone of this plan is: we need a villain. Eastasia! Oceana! Osama bin Laden! We’re gonna find you Goddamnit! Wanted Dead or Alive! You can run but you can't hide!

And now Pakistan is wrecking the Game Plan by saying we can't send troops into their country to search for, uh, the Cisco Ki— I mean, the Reichstag, uhh, oh come on…Osama bin Laden, that’s it. Pervez Musharraf actually said “I challenge anybody coming into our mountains. They would regret that day.”

What?!?!?!?! After everything we've done for those towelheads, and this is how they pay us back??? That does it. They're in our crosshairs now! Don’t worry, it'll be a cakewalk.

Vietnam, Iraq and Iran: Government Deception Then and Now

There are two recent news items that reveal the American government’s lies and dirty tricks during the 1960s. You might notice a few parallels between our government sleaze in Vietnam and Latin America and the current manufactured hysteria over Iraq and Iran.

This report shows some of the trickery played by both sides during the Vietnam War. For one thing, the famous Gulf of Tonkin “incident” never occurred. This alleged “attack” happened in August 1964. This was Lyndon Johnson’s excuse to escalate American attacks on North Vietnam. This was the attack that changed the Vietnam War from a “minor” conflict involving just a few American troops (with “light at the end of the tunnel”) to a full-blown war bringing thousands of American soldiers home in bodybags. And now we find out that the Gulf of Tonkin Incident never even happened.

This report was released at the request of the Federation of American Scientists for their project on government secrecy. The director of the project, Steven Aftergood, said: “What this study demonstrated is that the available intelligence shows that there was no attack. It's a dramatic reversal of the historical record.”

Philip Agee, a former CIA agent, died this past Wednesday. He left the CIA in 1969 after working mostly in Latin America for twelve years. In 1975 he wrote a book, “Inside the Company: CIA Diary” which revealed the CIA’s dirty tricks in Latin America.

His book also revealed the identities of some of his former CIA colleagues. Agee said he disclosed their identities “to weaken the instrument for carrying out the policy of supporting military dictatorships” in Greece, Chile, Argentina, Uruguay and Brazil. He said those regimes “were supported by the CIA and the human cost was immense: torture, executions, death squads.”

Agee’s book inspired a law — passed in the 1970s — making it illegal to disclose the identity of a CIA operative. Hmmm… that’s illegal? Who knew.

cross-posted at Bring It On!

Lessons From a Rightwing Biblehumping Douchebag

If you live within broadcast or newspaper range of Seattle, you’re probably familiar with the Reverend Ken Hutcherson. He's the Pacific Northwest’s answer to Pat Robertson, James Dobson and Torquemada.

H/T to Daniel DiRito (here and here) for this story.

In his neverending battle against the Homosexual Agenda, Reverend Hutcherson has found a vicious new go-for-the-jugular tactic. My first thought was that Ken Hutcherson is just a pathetic lowlife shitstain. But at the same time: hey, liberal and populist groups could also use this same tactic. Sure he's a pukebag, but maybe he can teach us something.

Hutcherson’s Antioch Bible Church is located near Microsoft’s headquarters. He's trying to get millions of Biblewipes to purchase shares of Microsoft stock so they can exert control over Microsoft’s employment policies. Microsoft has been violating God’s Law by offering benefits to same-sex couples. Microsoft shareholders have repeatedly voted in favor of these policies.

Hutcherson is hoping that if enough mouthbreathing snakehandlers own shares of Microsoft, they can force the company to stop these blasphemous practices and drive those homosexual sinners back into the closet, as God intended.

Being a man of God (supposedly), does Ken Hutcherson devote any time or effort toward poverty, homelessness and the fifty million Americans who have no health insurance? No, no and no.

Hutcherson tried to intimidate Microsoft’s leaders at their last annual shareholders’ meeting. “I could work with you, or I could be your worst nightmare…I hope to hear from you and if not, you will hear from me.”

Think how much America could be improved if liberal and populist organizations used these same tactics. Imagine, millions of people buying shares of Halliburton, Exxon, Monsanto, the largest banks — and forcing them to change their destructive policies.

The Far Right is extremely diligent and persistent and they have a no-holds-barred shrewdness that the Left could use. Since the 1970s the Right has had stealth candidates infiltrating thousands of school boards and city councils throughout the country. Rightwing think tanks have spent decades pulling strings at the highest levels of government. And now we have Ken Hutcherson’s jugular tactics. If only we could use these methods to solve some REAL problems.

In the meantime: Ken Hutcherson, go perform a reproductive act with your female parental unit.

Iran Attacks!!

See, this is what happens when we DON’T stage a pre-emptive attack on an enemy. Is this enough evidence for you liberal pansies? Do you peacenik pussies finally Get It???

Decent Americans have always known that Iran has Weapons of Mass Destruction, is closely allied with Osama bin Laden and masterminded the September 11th attacks. But those F#$%&@! Surrender Monkeys keep tying the hands of our Commander-in-Chief.

Maybe NOW we’ll finally have an excuse to do what we have to do: take out those swarthy furriners once and for all.

We can't even send three U.S. Navy ships into the Persian Gulf without being harassed by — uh, Persians...[scratches head]...of course, if three Persian Navy ships came sailing into the Caribbean…well, uhh…ahem…there's no comparison…nothing to see here…

Dick Cheney: Eight More Years

Well, not Dick Cheney exactly. But if Rudy Giuliani gets into the White House, he wants his vice president to be someone like Cheney.

Giuliani was answering questions from voters in New Hampshire, and one of them asked who would be Secretary of State in his administration. His answer was:

“Let me 9/11 answer with the 9/11 question of what you 9/11 would look for in a 9/11 vice president first — again without any 9/11 presumption that I'm 9/11 going to be the nominee. A vice president 9/11 has to be a partner in the 9/11 administration. The vice president has to know 9/11 everything that's going on, just in case 9/11 the vice president has to step in at a moment's notice.”

He said he spoke with Cheney on September 11, 2001 and felt that the vice president “had a sense that he knew what he was doing.”

Giuliani also said he might choose his current White House rivals to serve in his cabinet. There's something to look forward to: President Giuliani, and the top cabinet posts being held by Mitt Romney, John McCain, Mike Huckabee…

**************************************

With Barack Obama winning in Iowa, the attack is on. Mitt Romney said: “Did you listen to Barack Obama? He is a new face, but gosh when you listen to what comes out of his mouth. It’s like, ‘We're going to just get our troops out of Iraq.’ Have you thought about the consequences?”

Well, Asswipe, that’s pretty much how we got INTO Iraq, isn't it? Were you thinking about “the consequences” then?

Oh, that’s right, there'll be a bloodbath if we pull out of Iraq. If we pull out now, there'll be a bloodbath. If we pull out in 900 years there'll be a bloodbath. Well, as the Great Ronald Reagan once said: “If it takes a bloodbath, let’s get it over with.”

Stepping Up the War on Drugs — Again

The Worst President Ever has now combined the War on Drugs with the firing of those eight federal prosecutors.

Kevin Ryan was U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of California until he was purged in December 2006. Bush’s replacement is Joseph Russoniello, who's been one of the most gung ho drug warriors since the early 1980s.

According to this article, the Senate hasn’t yet voted on Russoniello’s confirmation. But according to this story, Russoniello WAS confirmed by the Senate in mid-December. Left hand meet the right hand…

Russoniello was a cofounder of California’s infamous CAMP (Campaign Against Marijuana Planting) program: Every harvest season, government helicopters come swooping in on California’s pot farmers (and anyone else who happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time). Where are all those anti-tax “taxpayers’ rights” groups when shit like this happens? The same people who go ballistic over libraries and every other “waste of tax dollars” suddenly develop mass laryngitis when it comes to Iraqmire and the War on Drugs.

Russoniello has been one of the ringleaders of the Republican approach to crime for the past 25 years: Let’s quit dithering over white collar crime and start going after those small-time drug users instead.

In 1994 he told an interviewer that marijuana growers in California were “like an open wound on our prayer hand.” Oooookay.

With the medical marijuana issue heating up in California — most Californians are in favor of it; Dumbya and his puppetmasters are against it — you can guess what this douchebag’s top priority will be. Let’s crack down on these whiny cancer patients; enough of this “waaaaaaahhh!!! I’m nauseous from chemotherapy.” Stand up and take it like a man!

Russoniello is a perfect example of our government's schizophrenic approach to drugs. He goes for the jugular when it comes to pot growers and small-time drug users, but he's been surprisingly lenient with major cocaine dealers. In the 1980s he was “investigating” the connection between cocaine and Ronald Reagan’s rightwing terrorists (the “Contras”) in Nicaragua. Several Contra-affiliated dealers were arrested with huge amounts of cocaine. Russoniello “declined” to investigate any further; he insisted these dealers couldn’t possibly have any connection with the Contras.

Check out some of the links here on the Nicaraguan Contras/cocaine connection. It's a dark chapter in America's history; one of many.

And so another shitstain joins the Bush Administration; another grain of sand on Jones Beach.

cross-posted at Bring It On!